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GOODIES COR COMICS SYNOPSIS #26
(by Linda Kay)
(from C&G 98 – February 2004)
Issue 161
June 30, 1973 No. 49
The summer months in Britain traditionally bring an influx of vacationers to the seashore. Since Cor!! scheduled their comics to reflect the seasons, The Goodies would see plots revolving around the seaside several times during the summer months of its year-long run. In this outing the plot revolves around the holiday seashore, although the locale quickly changes to a more original setting, that of an airport.
Header: THE GOODIES RESORT TO TRICK TACTICS TO BRING HOLIDAYMAKERS BACK TO BRITAIN!
The Goodies are riding their trandem along a cozy but abandoned seaside town named Winklesea. They're dressed in summery beach garb.
BILL: 'S funny, it's the height of the holiday season yet the whole town of Winklesea's closed down!
GRAEME: You're right! There doesn't appear to be anyone here!
TIM: Yes there is! Look over there, on the end of the pier!
The Goodies approach a grizzled old fisherman who is fishing off the end of the pier (with a fair amount of flies buzzing around his head).
FISHERMAN: Nobody comes here anymore! They've all gone abroad for their holidays! You're our first visitors here this year!
TIM: Well it was *fun* when my nannie used to bring me here! Lost of rock, fish 'n' chips, and ginger pop!
Bill cries into a handkerchief as the Goodies discuss this turn of events.
BILL: Those were the good old days - before everyone zoomed off in aeroplanes! Pity we can't have them back again!
TIM: We just can't stand by and let the traditional British summer holiday fade away!
GRAEME: Then it's up to us to bring the holiday makers back again!
The Goodies ride off on their trandem.
BILL: Can't we stop for just a *paddle*?
GRAEME: Not until we've got some *holiday makers*! Where's the nearest airport?
TIM: What are we going to do? Hi-jack a plane?
Arriving at the Winklesea Airport the Goodies spot a dilapidated airplane sitting in a field.
GRAEME: Look ... there's the very plane to transport holiday makers to Winklesea!
BILL: Are you kidding? That old thing hasn't got any wings or engines!
IN THE AIRPORT LOUNGE ...
Graeme eyes some sunglasses in a nearby kiosk selling "Duty Free Goodies."
GRAEME: H'mmm ... I see a way of keeping the trippers in the *dark* as to what they're flying in!
Graeme buys up all the pairs of sunglasses and the Goodies beat a hasty retreat, leaving a traveller in the lurch at the kiosk while they dart through a door marked "Air Crews Only" (they throw the doors open so quickly a pilot gets smashed behind one door!).
FEMALE CLERK IN KIOSK: Sorry, sir! No sun glasses - I've just sold the lot!
TIM: What are we going to do now?
GRAEME: A quick-change act of course!
The Goodies emerge from the air crew quarters in their disguises. Graeme is dressed as a modern day pilot while Bill is dressed as an old fashioned pilot, including flyer's cap and goggles. Tim is dressed as a stewardess with a short skirt and wig. Tim hits Bill with his purse when Bill makes a fresh remark.
BILL: Coo ... the hostess with the mostess? Nnn-gg-g!
TIM: Ooh ... you are awful!
GRAEME: Dispense with the wit and hand out the glasses!
Graeme hands out the sunglasses to a waiting queue of travellers in the lounge as Tim sexily leads the way.
GRAEME: You'll find the sun quite bright on the Costa Bravo! Wear your sun glasses now and you'll be used to the glare by the time we get there!
TIM: And please follow me, everybody!
They lead the passengers out to the field where the old plane awaits them. The travellers have to walk single file holding onto the back of the person in front of them to find their way with the sunglasses on.
PASSENGER #1: Erk . I can't see a thing!
BILL: That's all right! This is a night flight!
The passengers pile into the plane to find it standing room only. One irate (and large) tourist grabs Bill by the jacket while the other passengers push and shove for room.
PASSENGER #2: Grr ... where are the seats?
BILL: They've been removed to pack more in! After all ... this is a package tour!
GRAEME: Anyway, at the speed we'll be going you'll hardly have time to settle down before you're there!
The Goodies head into the flight deck and wave back at the passengers.
GRAEME: See you all when we get there!
Slipping out of the cockpit, Graeme and Tim sit upon the trandem, which has been tied to the front of the plane with a small rope. Bill is somewhere behind the plane.
GRAEME: *Contact!* All set at the back?
BILL: As ready as I'll ever be!
Graeme and Tim pedal and pull the plane along behind them as Bill pushes the plane along from behind. The rolling plane heads through town, causing quite a commotion as cars (and even a cow) jump out of its way.
BILL: I thought I was supposed to be the *co-pilot* not the flippin' rear runner!
A FEW MINUTES LATER ...
The Goodies pull the plane off the road onto a golf course at the edge of Winklesea's beach. The plane bumps to a stop as Graeme and Tim fall off the bike and Bill collapses in exhaustion. The passengers have all hit the top of the aircraft upon stopping, one actually crashing through the top of the plane!
GRAEME: This'll do!
TIM: It'll have to do, I'm nearly on my knees!
PASSENGER #3: Oo! Owch! Talk about a bumpy landing!
The jostled and shell-shocked passengers exit the plane with the Goodies help, although the Goodies don't look too well after their trip, either.
GRAEME: Welcome to Costa Bravo! We hope you enjoyed your trip!
BILL: *They* might have but *I* didn't!
The passengers look around at their surroundings angrily as the Goodies watch with apprehension.
TIM: Er ... they don't look very happy to be here!
PASSENGER #4: Well, I'll go to our house!
WOMAN PASSENGER: You might as well! That's it over there! We're all back where we started, in our *hometown of Winklesea!*
The big, mean-looking passenger turns on Bill angrily.
PASSENGER #2: Since people stopped coming here we always take our holidays this time of year!
GRAEME: Well, *we're* here, aren't we?
TIM: And if people see us *enjoying ourselves* they might *stop* instead of driving through to the airport!
SO ...
The Goodies have their beach holiday but they find everything priced extravagantly, the water cold and Tim can't get his beach chair to unfold. A car with two tourists look down on the scene with disdain.
GRAEME: A cold hot dog and a cup of tea 50 p!
TIM: Yeow ... look at the prices the locals are charging ... we're being taken for a ride!
BILL: Yeah! It's me for the Costa Bravo next year!
FEMALE TOURIST: Don't stop here, *dear*! It's far too *dear*!
Sign-Off Line: Will the Goodies be all at sea again next week?
RATING (using the BLACK PUDDING RATING SYSTEM):
III - Goody goody yum yum.
Overall this comic strip is clever and amusing, although there are some oddities. In the first panel the word balloons are arranged in a very confusing manner, almost manga-style (right to left). It's not difficult to figure out the order they should be read, but it's still a bit strange, especially since the dialogue could easily have been interchanged between the characters. Also the writer favors exclamation marks, using them after practically every sentence. Anotherstrange word balloon is credited to Tim as the plane reaches the seaside. It shows Tim saying "It'll have to, I'm nearly on my knees!" but since he is pedalling the trandem this doesn't seem to make much sense. More likely the line was meant for Bill, who has been pushing the plane and collapses. The person inking the comic may have accidentally assigned the balloon to the wrong person.
This comic is a great example of the background jokes so common to the series. In the first panel the town seems deserted, so much so even a little plant is growing out of a crack in the middle of the main street. As the Goodies speak to the fisherman on the pier he is reeling in an old boot. When they arrive at the airport the air is literally filled with various planes, one of which has clipped a bird while apparently breaking the sound barrier with a loud "Ker-boof!" One pilot stands near his plane looking at a map. The dilapidated plane the Goodies decide to use has an anchor hanging off its nose, although it's apparent from the airbus' condition it isn't going anywhere.
Inside the airport Tim is eyeing a kiosk next to the Duty Free shop where a huge woman and skeletal-looking man stand and a sign above them reads "I'm Natasha, Fly Me to Siberia." The woman working in the duty free shop has been busy powdering her face, and in the next panel she is putting on her feminine charms while telling the man she's sold all of the sunglasses. Not to be outdone, Tim turns on *his* feminine charm as he leads the passengers to the plane (the twirling of his purse and hand on his hip are pretty clear). Tim also appears to be singing "Hi-Ya-Conga" as he heads for the plane. A woman roughly pushes her way against the crowd inside the plane, and a button outside the Flight Deck reads "Stop", which undoubtedly would be an interesting way to stop a plane!
As the Goodies tow and push the plane through town a sign which reads "Warning! Low Flying Aircraft" takes on new meaning. As the plane pulls into the golf course it doesn't disturb a couple of golfers getting ready to tee-off, while another golfer's club is barely showing from a hole he's dug himself into and a far-off golfer teeters on the brink of a cliff. A rabbit also runs for cover in that panel. Finally on the beach in the last panel there are signs which read "Beach Huts - 5 pounds," "Deck Chairs - 45 p per hour," "Ice Cream (Easy
Terms)," "Hotel Sordide," and "Any More for the Skylark? 1.50 pounds per trip, (Oar hire 75 p, Rowlocks 50 p)." Bill also wears a hat which reads "Sockit to Me," an expression popularized on America's comedy show Laugh-In. Also an attendant is holding a gun on a man relaxing in a deck chair on the beach, apparently to collect what the man owes on his deck chair hire. The beach is also strewn with a fair amount of litter and empty bottles, even an empty tube of something called Squeezo.
These background jokes, along with the chance to see Tim wearing a stewardess outfit, make this comic a lot of fun all around.
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