The Official Goodies Rule - OK! Fan Club Website

THE GOODIES CLARION AND GLOBE

THE OFFICIAL NEWSLETTER OF 'THE GOODIES RULE - OK' FAN CLUB

Issue No. 76 14th April 2002

E-MAIL ADDRESSES

Newsletter enquiries: clarion@goodiesruleok.com

General enquiries: enquiries@goodiesruleok.com

'The Goodies Rule - OK!'

Chadstone VIC 3148, AUSTRALIA

THE LADS AND LASSES OF THE C&G

COOL COR COMIC REVIEWER

- Amanda Stokes, Kelly Adey,

1. BOFFO IDEAS - Club happenings and ideas.

2. SPOTTED!!! - The latest Goodies sightings

3. 2001 AND A BIT - Tim, Graeme and Bill sightings post-Goodies.

4. GOODIES EPISODE SUMMARY - Wacky Wales.

6. GOODIES COR!! COMICS SYNOPSIS #5

You can make it happen here. Liven up the club with a boffo idea for bob-a-job week. E-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com> with your comments, ideas or suggestions - meanwhile these are the boffo ideas which our club has been working on this month:

From next month onwards, the "Quiz & Quote" section will return to the C&G after an absence of a few months. I also hope to regularly include some Goodies "feature articles" that I've received from various contributors but haven't yet had much spare time to type them out, so stay tuned to "Radio Goodies" for these and other new developments with the C&G.

GROK WEBSITE LOOKING GOOD

(by Lisa Manekofsky - posted to Goodies-L on 11th April)

If you haven't visited the Goodies Rule - OK! website in the past week, you might want to pop over to check out the latest upgrade (courtesy of webmaster Tim Aslat). I think the highlight of the upgrade is format of the Forum section, which is now considerably more user friendly.

Stop by, check it out, and vote in the "What do you think of the upgrade?" poll at http://www.goodiesruleok.com

THERE'S HOPE FOR GOODIES DVDS YET!

(by Lisa Manekofsky)

On 8 April, Daniel Bowen sent a note to the goodies-l mailing list saying that BBC Learning, a part of BBC Worldwide, were asking for suggestions as to what to release on DVD. Daniel included the URL for those interested in submitting suggestions. I sent in a request for "The Goodies", noting that there should be interest in any future releases since so few episodes have been released to date.

Shortly after I mailed my suggestion a message from Ian Greaves appeared in my inbox, courtesy of goodies-l. Ian explained that the BBC Learning division probably wasn't the appropriate place to request Goodies DVDs, since the division was created for "educational releases in the main, with a slant on television history as part of the background...clearly designed with schools & colleges in mind". Because of this new information, I didn't expect a response to the suggestion I had submitted. Therefore, I was pleasantly surprised when I received a response from Gavin Collinson at the BBC, which is reprinted below (with Gavin's permission):

Gavin Collinson wrote:

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This seems to be the month for people to ask for The Goodies. My reply to the first request is below - hope this helps to explain the situation.

Many thanks for your email. Good news and bad news, I'm afraid. The bad news is that it's unlikely The Goodies will in the short term get a BBC Special Interests release, not because I (or anyone else) in SI doesn't like the show, but because sketch based comedy isn't currently in our remit. For what it's worth, I agree with your comments on the programme and would go further to suggest that the work some of the team did afterwards was equally good. (I'm thinking specifically of 'I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue).

The good news is that there is currently masses more interest in Archive tv than there was even, say three years ago, which augers well. The BBC is releasing more and more material similar to this and I suspect that at some point in the not too distant future The Goodies will (quite literally) ride again.

Sorry I can't give a more positive or concrete answer - I know it's hugely frustrating to adore a programme and have limited access to it. I'll pass your comments on to colleagues working on other ranges of DVDs and videos and hopefully at some stage we'll have a more extensive range of The Goodies.

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It certainly can't hurt for someone within the BBC to pass along word that a lot of people are interested in a DVD release of "The Goodies". Maybe the right person will *finally* get the message!

More exciting than getting your wig-spotters badge! If you've seen the Goodies recently, e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com>with the details. Here's where we've Spotted!!! The Goodies this month:

SINGALONGA GOODIES!

(by Lisa Manekofsky)

The following article appeared in the Glasgow Evening Times on 7 February 1974, around the time of the release of the Goodies first album, "The Goodies Sing Songs from The Goodies" (later re-released as "The World of the Goodies"):

I'm a writer, claims top comic Bill

Bill Oddie - the tubby, bearded one in "The Goodies" TV series - lives in what is surely the loveliest house in Hampstead, London. It is a vast, elegant mansion with a garden which runs down to a lake and with views across the rolling woodland of the heath. Bill (32) says the house (and the cost of paying for it) inspires him in his work as a writer.

"I think of myself as a writer who sometimes acts, although lots of people believe I am a full-time comedian," he says.

As well as "The Goodies," Bill has written for many other series including "Doctor in Charge" and "Monty Python's Flying Circus."

Now Bill, who holds a Cambridge MA degree in English, is working hard to promote an album of songs from "The Goodies." "There are plenty of comic bits on it, but I'd like people to have a good listen to the music. I have put quite a lot of work into writing the songs and I'd like the record to be given a chance."

"The trouble is that if I write a script, I know myself if it is good or not. But with music I can't really tell. I am much more insecure."

His security has been increased by the news the BBC isn't going to ban any tracks from the album. Neither of Oddie's previous records - about footballer Nobby Stiles and about mods and rockers - was played for censorship reasons.

3. 2001 AND A BIT

If you've sighted Tim, Bill or Graeme in a post-Goodies role, e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com> so that we can tell everyone where to spot a Goodie nowadays.

(from information provided by Lisa Manekofsky and David Balston)

The following is from the Radio 4 Newsletter - April 12 2002:

I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue celebrates its 30th birthday this weekend, and we've assembled audio and video interviews with the team, a quiz and even some colourful wallpaper to download.

The Mornington Crescent board is predicted to hit 2000 posts sometime this weekend and, when it does, there'll be a virtual party on the board. Everyone is invited. http://www.bbc.co.uk/cgi-perl/h2/h2.cgi?state=view&board=radio4.game

And from an edition of the Radio Times (that someone actually bothered to read!):

"I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue: 30th Anniversary Special

Channel: BBC Radio 4

Date: Saturday 13 April Time: 6:15pm to 7:00pm

A special edition of the perennial antidote to panel games. Stephen Fry joins regulars Barry Cryer, Graeme Garden, Tim Brooke-Taylor and chairman Humphrey Lyttelton.

PLEASE NOTE that the show is scheduled to run 45 minutes (instead of the usual 30)."

Also the normal 6 show series of "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue" starts broadcasting on Monday 20 May at 6.30pm as usual

WILLIE RUSHTON HONOURED

(by Lisa Manekofsky - posted to Goodies-L on 22nd March)

Mornington Crescent honours Rushton

Comedian Willie Rushton, who died in 1996, has been honoured by the unveiling of a plaque at a London tube station.

Comic Heritage placed the plaque in the ticket hall of Mornington Crescent station to honour the satirist, a leading exponent of the Mornington Crescent panel game on BBC Radio 4's I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue.

Fellow panelists Tim Brooke-Taylor, Barry Cryer and Graeme Garden were at the unveiling - along with 200 fans.

London Underground's Jeff Mills said: "We are delighted to honour this much-loved comic raconteur - Willie's plaque will provide a complimentary and fitting tribute to be enjoyed by the thousands of customers who pass through this station daily.

GRAEME AT HIS PEAK

(from information provided by Amanda Stokes and Kelly Adey)

The episode of Peak Practice featuring Graeme Garden was shown on Australian television, Channel 7 (Prime), last Thursday 21st March at 2pm. He played a "gardener" of an estate called Sid who suffered from problems with his thyroid gland. However, by the end of the episode we find out that Sid is actually Sir Sid who owns the estate. His storyline was the secondary one but he outshone the actor in the main storyline. Call me biased but, what the hell, I am.

TIM'S COMEDY LINKS

(by David Balston - posted to Goodies-L on 2nd April)

Tim's radio clip show "Tim's Comedy Links" gets a repeat airing starting from 11pm Tuesday 9th April on BBC Radio 4.

(by David Balston - posted to Goodies-L on 5th April)

Graeme's sketch show about modern life returns for a second series from Thursday 18th April at 6.30pm on Radio 4,

It also stars Eleanor Bron, Neil Innes, Clive Swift, Roger Blake and Paula Wilcox. Music from Ronnie and the Rex.

4. GOODIES EPISODE SUMMARY

First screened: 3rd March 1975

Tim indulges in some very off-key singing and packs his bags in preparation for a visit to Wales, as the Goodies have been invited to perform at an eisteddfod on the isle of Llan dlubber. They have been asked by the local preacher Reverend Llewellyn and Graeme reads out his letter, which contains references to Max Bygraves, Rolf Harris, "get stuffed" and "indecent exposure" amongst all sorts of Welsh gibberish and they have no idea what it all means, but head off for a fun holiday after a quick practice of their 3 part folk song (which is quickly canned as "what a load of rubbish!")

They ride into Wales (which initially appears to be closed!) to find road signs that advise them of no dancing, singing, drinking or girls (and no chance!). The trandem overheats its radiator as it climbs the many hills and Bill gets a bucket of water poured on his head when he calls at an inn for help. An epic train ride and a paddle in a rowboat gets them out to Llan dlubber, where they are dragged into the water by the coast watcher and they are still soaking wet when they enter the Reverend's church.

Bill is ready to launch into the multitude of bottles in the dusty-looking bar, but is disgusted to find that they are all empty. The Reverend enters and they soon find out that his people are a dying race as they shun wicked and sinful things like booze, sex, tea, food and even lavatories, much to Bill's bewilderment. Even the eisteddfod will provide little enjoyment (coming from the old Welsh words "eistedd" (bored) and "fod" (stiff)!) as the Reverend prepares to open the Llan dlubber International Festival Of Gloom.

The audience of traditionally dressed Welsh folk either munch away on their leeks or fall asleep through a procession of boring local singers, but the Goodies decide to show them all of the fun that they are missing with a rousing routine of fan dancers, magicians, rock singers and plenty of bare flesh. However this lands them in deep trouble with the Reverend and the council of druids, as the "prisoners of the bar" are charged with "trying to entertain us!!" (to a shocked chorus of "No!!" from the druids) and are taken to the druid's stone while being whipped along the way (much to Tim's enjoyment!).

The Goodies are condemned to having their heads chopped off for their sins, as the Reverend plans a slap-up repentance afterwards. He first reveals that the druids really worship rugby and that the enjoyment of sins such as booze and women are not allowed because the druids can't play rugby with debauched bodies. A final hymn is sung before the sacrifice about playing touch with the goalman's daughter, but the Reverend stops in horror when he realises that the Goodies know the words and he can no longer execute them, as they have proved that they are fellow Welshmen. His invitation for them to become druids too is politely refused because the Goodies are strictly Church Of England, so an ecclesiastical seven-a-sides rugby tournament is arranged to determine which religion is the best.

After various knockout matches, the Welsh Druids thrash the Catholics 159-0 in the final and these humble, devout, deeply religious people partake in a reverent mystical ceremony afterwards - a wild beer-throwing celebration as the Reverend (complete with jockstrap on his head!) leads the charge. However Tim discovers that the Druids have cheated by including half of the Welsh international team in their line-up and tests out their biblical knowledge before he disqualifies them. This doesn't exactly please the Welsh boyos and they take to the field again using Tim and then Bill as the ball, as they toss and kick them around everywhere.

Bill grabs the ball and runs out of the stadium with the scrum following him and finally shakes them off with the help of a brick wall and Graeme's remarkable line marking machine, which disposes of the Welsh players down a trap door and leaves the Goodies to score a very easy winning try with no opposition. The next Sunday, Bill is dressed as an Archbishop ready to play in the big Sunday League game, but Graeme and Tim are content to go to the traditional service at St.Pauls - yelling "He's the almighty!" in true rugby style!

* Reverend: (I am) "a vicar of the Church Of Seventh Day Repressionists."

* Reverend: "Oh we're righteous people, right enough. You'll catch none of us committing one of the 9764 deadly sins!"

* Reverend: "Sandwiches?! You mean food?! We allow no voluptuous indulgences of the carnal appetites. Where does eating get you, eh? You'll be wanting lavatories next!"

Bill: "Oi, don't tell me you haven't got any lavatories!"

Reverend: "Temples of Beelzebub! The open door to hellfire and brimstone! The hot seat!"

Bill: "No wonder you're a dying race. I suspect you're all dying for a ...!"

* Reverend: "Contestants will be judged by a jury of druids and the winner will be pronounced bard"

Bill: "Bard! ... I should think he'd be ruddy awful!"

* Reverend: "... or my lodger upstairs, Evan's Above..."

* Tim: "I come from Abergavenny. And him ..."

Bill: "Aberbanana! And him ..."

Graeme: "Aber dabba dabba dabba dabba dabba dabba said the monkey to the chimp ...!"

* Tim: "Have a leek boyo!"

Graeme: "Ha, ha, no thanks, I've just been!"

* (the Welsh Rugby team are singing a song about "four and twenty virgins")

Bill: "Please, please, please ... (covers Tim's ears) ... that song ... honestly ... it's not holy!"

Reverend: "Not holy! It's about flippin' virgins, isn't it? You can't get much holier than that!"

* The Goodies stopping to photograph two Welsh ladies sitting at a spinning wheel wearing traditional costumes including very tall black hats, with smoke starting to billow from the hats and the ladies walking away to reveal two chimney stacks directly behind where they were sitting.

* The Goodies boarding a train at the station with the longest name in Wales ('Llanfair ...etc) visible on a sign in the background. The train travels to the end of the sign (.. .gogogoch'.), then stops, with the passengers all disembarking after their long journey.

* Their initial meeting with Reverend Llewellyn in which he condemns everything that sounds remotely enjoyable including beer ("the devil's brew"), tea ("foul potion of the orient, stimulator of the flesh and inflamer of the senses"), having babies ("sinful wickedness"), food ("voluptuous indulgence of the carnal appetites") and lavatories ("temples of Beelzebub")

* Livening up the eisteddfod somewhat, including Tim losing his trousers, a rocking version of 'We'll Keep A Welcome', Bill bursting the balloons on a scantily clad lady before popping her with his cigar, a fan dancer who turns into Tim clad in yellow undies, Bill as a flasher in a trenchcoat and the curtain dropping down on the Goodies and their lovely assistant who is soon screaming in terror as there is much clamouring about underneath the fallen material. All of this fails to impress the locals who continue chewing stoically on their leeks throughout the performance.

* Some of the scenes from the ecclesiastical rugby tournament, including the Church Of England archbishops streaming down the field in their colourful flowing robes and Mary Whitehouse playing as a hooker and waddling the length of the field for a try, with no-one game enough to tackle her. Lord Longford then runs in to congratulate her and gets his face slapped for his trouble, while Mary's rough tackle causes Brother Ignatius to break his vow of silence and mouth what looks very much like "You f...ing old bitch!" in her direction!

* Bill pushing a fisherman off a rather tall bridge in his haste to get away from the pursuing Welsh rugby players.

Jon Pertwee, Marcelle Samett, Alun Williams, The Fred Tomlinson Singers

We'll Keep A Welcome

A very funny sendup of their not-so-fun-loving Welsh neighbors with plenty of interesting visual material and great quotes, especially from Jon Pertwee in his brilliant guest role as Reverend Llewellyn. The various rugby scenes might go on a bit long, but are still amusing enough to retain viewer interest.

IIII Officially amazing

BLACK PUDDING RATINGS SYSTEM:

IIII - Officially amazing.

III - Goody goody yum yum.

II - Fair-y punkmother.

I - Tripe on t' pikelets.

May Episode Summary – Frankenfido

5. GOODIES COR COMICS SYNOPSIS #5

3rd February, 1973. No. 28

Ethnic humor, while currently not generally accepted as being politically correct, has long been a part of comedy tradition. The Goodies themselves were certainly not above poking fun at various cultures and the traditions therein. Ethnic humor should be unacceptable when characters are unfairly stereotyped with the sole purpose of insulting or demeaning those people for the sake of belittling them cruelly (i.e., for political propagandist reasons). But the basis of almost all comedy has always been to identify and ridicule the foibles of human nature, regardless of ethnicity. In the world of The Goodies, everything was fair game, including their own culture. One might say they were equal opportunity humorists.

One basic reason for ethnic humor is probably the ease of picking a particular setting in which to come up with jokes. Take a specific event and the comic possibilities of that event and one doesn't care if it's the Academy Awards, the Olympics or a meeting of the Houses of Parliament ... in coming up with comedy in those settings one is bound to make stereotypical jokes about the Hollywood elite, the international politics in Olympic voting, or the arguments of the British House of Lords. It's only natural. People laugh at what they recognize.

The comic pages were no exception and indeed some of the humor seen in such past comic magazines as Cor!! might not be wholly acceptable today. This month's comic isn't particularly derogatory in any way, shape or form, but the fact that much of the humor is based around Scottish traditions might make it be construed as such today. But picking the Highland Games as a setting in which to put The Goodies makes perfect sense, as The Goodies themselves often poked fun at Scottish traditions. Let's face it, a good setting with comic possibilities is always fair game to humor writers all around the world.

Header: THE GOODIES DECIDE TO GIVE THE HIGHLAND GAMES A FLING!

The Goodies are riding their trandem beside a tall wooden fence, behind which we see the top of a tent, a flying caber and a Scotsman hanging onto a hurling hammer. Tim points to a sign tacked onto the fence which reads "HIGHLAND GAMES - *BIG* Money PRIZES. The Noo!!"

TIM: Hey, look! We'll go in and try and win some money!

As they ride through the entrance a Scotsman holds his hand up to stop them cold, knocking them clean off the bike, which rolls on without them.

ENTRANCE SCOTSMAN: *OOT!* Ye canna come in here unless ye're wearin' the *KILT*!

Undaunted, the Goodies sneak along the fence until they spy a large Scotsman bending over to pick up a hammer (a sign nearby reads 'Putting the Shot? Hammer?'). Tim reaches through a gap in the fence to remove a safety pin from the back of the man's kilt.

BILL? (We can only see his eye through a knothole): ... just ... remove ... his ... kilt ... pin.

HAMMER SCOTSMAN: Right! I'm ready to throw the hammer!

The Scotsman spins around to throw the hammer and his kilt unwinds from his middle. Tim is quick to pull it through the gap in the fence. The Scotsman releases the hammer and looks down with surprise to find he's standing in his boxer shorts.

TIM (On other side of fence): ... scissors, please!

HAMMER SCOTSMAN: What a throw! OCH! Where's ma kilt?

SO, BEFORE YOU COULD SAY BOISTERING BAGPIPES . . .

The Goodies proudly re-enter the game on foot, each wearing a kilt cut from the large Scotsman's tartan (Bill's is high up around his chest and Tim has suspenders to help keep his up). The Scotsman at the entrance welcomes them warmly.

GRAEME: The Clan MacGoodies ready for the games!

ENTRANCE SCOTSMAN: Welcome, fellow Scots!

Graeme spots what looks like a hammer lying on the ground and anxiously runs toward it, leaving Bill and Tim befuddled in his wake (meanwhile a man with a caber is crashing into a tent in the background).

GRAEME: I'll try and win first prize at throwing the wotsit!

Graeme picks up what he thinks is the hammer only to find he's holding the lead to a rather vicious Scotty dog which barks "MacYap! MacYap!" at him. Even more threatening is a behemoth of a Scottish woman rushing toward him swinging a tartan purse.

SCOTSWOMAN: *Eek!* Let go of my wee Scottie, ye villain!

Graeme runs from the dog, which is close on his heels (a small tent nearby advertises Haggis & Chips and someone is struggling with very large bagpipes in the background). He heads for a large pole (with romantic carvings in it such as Jack "heart" Joanne).

GRAEME: *Help!* I'll have to climb that tree or that pooch will have my kilt!

Graeme leaps up the pole, the dog only apparently getting a little bit of his kilt in the process.

GRAEME: *Phew!* Safe!

What Graeme doesn't realize is he's just climbed up the caber which Tim was attempting to throw, and it starts falling over as Tim watches in shock, his suspenders snapping in back. The dog watches with a "Yuk! Yuk!" and a nearby Scotsman sticks his fingers in his ears and Graeme plummets to the ground.

TIM: I say really! You've spoiled my chances of winning a prize for *CABER TOSSING*!

GRAEME: AAAAAAAGGGHHHH

SCOTSMAN WITH FINGERS IN EARS: TIMBER-R-R (The Noo).

MEANWHILE, BILL WAS BUSY, TOO ...

Bill is standing playing bagpipes in front of the Bagpipe Contest booth (the sign there also reads "Nae Sassenachs"). The Scotsman whose kilt they stole spots him and begins sticking corks into the reeds of the pipes.

BILL: Looks like it's up to me to win some money, so I'll enter the bagpipe contest!

HAMMER SCOTSMAN: That imposter's wearin' ma kilt! I recognise those twa moth holes! I'll plug his bagpipes!

Bill continues to blow and blow, filling the pipes like a balloon which lift him up off the ground. The Scotsman watches with a "Snigger!" as Bill floats high above the tent and keeps blowing until the corks pop out. He then starts flying around wildly.

BILL: YIPPEE! A highland rodeo!

HAMMER SCOTSMAN: Ride 'im, cowboy!

As the bagpipes run out of air, Bill is thrown from them in diving fashion (men in the background are standing next to a yak).

BILL: YEECH! I've taken a dive!

Bill lands face down on the ground (in the ground, actually) in front of a pair of crossed swords which are lying there. Two other men are standing at the ready in front of other crossed swords, and the dance organiser greets Bill in a friendly manner.

SWORD DANCING ORGANISER: Ye're just in time, mon! The sword dancing's just about to start!

BILL: Might as well have a go!

Nearby, Graeme and Tim are standing in front of a kiosk marked "PORRIDGE Making Competition" (the judge there looks as if he's eaten far too much porridge and is sick). Graeme and Tim each grab large bowls of porridge and throw them.

TIM: He'll never win against those two! Let's help him!

The bowls of porridge land under the feet of the other sword dancers, who quickly get caught up in the gooey mess. Bill, meanwhile, dances to his heart's content (although he's dancing the Hokey Pokey instead).

CONTESTANT #2: OCH! Ah'm stuck!

BILL: You put your right leg in and you shake it all about ...

The sword dancing judges confer amongst one another as Bill continues to dance (the lady judge *could* be the same woman who owned the Scottie dog, only now she's wearing glasses).

JUDGE #1: I make him the winner, Lady MacSporran of MacThinggy ... do ye agree?

LADY MacSPORRAN: Och, aye!

Lady MacSporran runs forward to present Bill with the winner's cup and prize cheque while Graeme and Tim look on. Only Bill's looked down just as his kilt has slipped, covering his legs.

LADY MacSPORRAN: Allow me to present you with a cheque and cup as first prize!

Bill is beside himself as Graeme and Tim run to the rescue.

BILL: AAAAGH! I'VE CUT ME LEGS OFF!

Bill looks relieved and Tim and Graeme pull his kilt up to reveal his legs, still intact.

TIM: Don't panic! YOUR KILT SLIPPED DOWN!

BILL: Coo! What a game it's been in the highlands!

Sign-Off Line: OUR PALS GET UP TO THEIR FUNNY "CABERS" AGAIN NEXT WEEK!

RATING (using the BLACK PUDDING RATING SYSTEM):

II - Fair-y punkmother.

Settings and ethnicity aside, the important thing is always the jokes, and in this particular entry the jokes don't come across as being particularly inspired. Throwing cabers and playing bagpipes isn't the most original material one can work with. Add to the mix some implausible gags like Graeme climbing a caber while Tim's holding it (okay, I know it's a comic strip, but there's a limit to what one can accept regardless of the cartoonish-ness of a gag) and a very weak ending and this comic just never lives up to its potential or the cleverness of other comics in the series. The artwork is quite good with lots of gags going on in the background which helps pull this one from the depths. But this comic situation should have had a lot more to offer.

To view these strips online, you can now visit this page: http://members.aol.com/corcomics

We'll post the currently reviewed issue plus the two previous issues for latecomers.

NEXT C&G EDITION: #77: - 12th May 2002.

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