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http://www.goodiesruleok.com
E-MAIL ADDRESSES
Newsletter enquiries: clarion@goodiesruleok.com
General enquiries: enquiries@goodiesruleok.com
POSTAL ADDRESS
'The Goodies Rule - OK!'
P.O. Box 413
Croydon VIC 3136, AUSTRALIA
THE LADS AND LASSES OF THE C&G
EDITOR
- Brett Allender <bretta@netcon.net.au>
ACE REPORTERS:
- Lisa Manekofsky <ljm@cs.brown.edu>
- David Piper-Balston <davidbalston@blueyonder.co.uk
- Alison Bean <bean_is_a_carrot@yahoo.com>
COOL COR COMIC & MUSIC REVIEWER:
- Linda Kay <Goodiesfan@aol.com>
C&G CONTRIBUTORS:
Amy Rixon, Bruce Probst, Miranda Worthington, Brian Labza
CONTENTS
1. QUIZ & QUOTE - Goodies brainteasers for you and you and you
2. SPOTTED!!! - The latest Goodies sightings.
3. 2001 AND A BIT - Tim, Graeme and Bill sightings post-Goodies.
4. AND NOW ... A WALK IN THE BLACK FOREST - Other Goodies and club-related news
5. GOODIES COR!! COMICS SYNOPSIS #43
6. QUIZ & QUOTE ANSWERS
1. QUIZ & QUOTE
(by "Magnus Magnesium")
QUOTE: "We've got to find him before he eats someone he shouldn't."
(a) Which Goodie says this quote?
(b) Who is he referring to?
(c) Which episode is this quote from?
QUIZ: This month's questions are from the episode: "Black & White Beauty"
(d) Which name has Graeme given all of his pets at the rest home?
(e) Which animal lands on Tim's head after it is catapulted into the air?
(f) Tim thinks that he's eating pickled walnuts. What are they in fact?
(g) What is the name of the neighbouring farm that Bill takes over?
(h) What are the odds first posted for Black & White Beauty to win the Grand National?
The answers are listed at the end of this newsletter.
2. SPOTTED!!!
More exciting than getting your wig-spotters badge! If you've seen the Goodies recently, e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com>with the details. Here's where we've Spotted!!! The Goodies this month:
THE GOODIES - STILL ALIVE ON STAGE
For all of the right-up-to-the-minute details of Tim and Graeme's tour schedule, please head to: http://www.goodiesruleok.com/faq.php?topic=10
GOODIES TOUR ARTICLE
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 30th September)
From Seven.com.au (http://seven.com.au/news/topstories/110690 )
and http://news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=65430
Goodies return with Oddie one out
Date: 01/10/05
By Gregg Tripp
The Goodies are coming back for you and you - well, most of them anyway. After a short season of sellout shows earlier this year, two of the cult comedy show's trio, Graeme Garden and Tim Brooke-Taylor, are returning for a nationwide tour.
The Goodies, a TV staple for kids who now find they are at least 35, showed on the ABC throughout most of the 1970s and 80s. In their time they battled a giant kitten, set up a radio station under the sea and beat each other senseless with black puddings...it all made perfect sense then. Playing under their real names, Graeme was the intellectual, Tim the royalist and Bill the revolutionary. The Goodies itself was revolutionary, cloaking social comment against themes like racism and sexual conservatism of the time in the ridiculous.
Ironically, the anti-establishment comedy has been all but forgotten in Britain, due to its limited airing. The BBC is finally putting together a documentary on The Goodies which will show at Christmas.
In their upcoming stage production, Graeme and Tim will reminisce about the TV series and they will show clips originally banned in Australia. Their strange 70s' hit The Funky Gibbon will also get a run.
The one who couldn't come back this time, Bill Oddie, has just had recent success with the live BBC nature program Springwatch and will stay in England to do a new series for autumn. "Bill will still haunt the show in various ways, and in various forms," says Tim.
Tim Brooke-Taylor, who studied for his law degree with Monty Python's John Cleese, says he learned of The Goodies popularity in Australia after coming to meet fans here in 2000. "What really impressed me was that they were such bright people about half my age who I really wanted to hang out with." He ultimately went back to England and convinced the others to be involved in a tour.
Not surprisingly, Tim says he isn't the character he portrayed in the Goodies. "I didn't like him at all," he says. "I have been described as a relentless wuss. We were all actually more like Bill."
Graeme Garden and Tim Brooke-Taylor have been performing together since the 1960s and have just done a show at the Edinburgh Comedy Festival. Ahead of their Australian tour, the pair will perform in the long-running English radio show, I'm Sorry, I Haven't A Clue, at the London Palladium.
During their earlier Australian outing this year, the team proved they still retain every bit of their irreverence, timing and good-hearted humour. This show is a chance to see two of the elder statesman of British comedy still in sharp form.
The Goodies, Still Alive on Stage, will begin in Sydney and play up and down the east coast, Adelaide, Perth and Tasmania.
THE GOODIES ON FOXTEL'S UK-TV
(Brian Labza - Goodies-l - 30th September)
Please note there is a Goodies mini-marathon this weekend on Foxtel (Australia wide)
The first 18 episodes only are being shown (i.e. most of seasons 1 and 2, in order), in three 3-hour blocks, at:
2.30 to 5.30 PM on Sat 1/10, Sun 2/10 and Mon 3/10, on UK-TV.
The program guide, curiously, includes "Caught In The Act", which will be interesting given that it is in very poor condition (as far as I know!) but excludes Kitten Kong. I will wait and see.
GOODIES THEME NIGHT IN LONDON
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 5th & 7th October)
In the above interview withTim Brooke-Taylor, he mentioned that BBC 2 is putting together a Goodies documentary to be shown around Christmas.
The news gets even better - later this month Tim, Graeme and Bill will be recording part of the show in front of a studio audience in London. I've been told they'll be discussing some of the best moments from "The Goodies".
The "Goodies Theme Night" special recording will take place Sunday 23rd October at 7pm at:
The London Studios
Upper Ground
London SE1 9LT
Entry is strictly ticket only (tickets are free). The only way to apply for tickets is via the website of the audience company STANDING ROOM ONLY (http://www.sroaudiences.com/ ). Details will appear on their site in the next day or so.
-----
I've been advised that tickets can also be applied for by contacting enquiries@sroaudiences.com as well as visiting the http://www.sroaudiences.com/ website. Also, it's likely that listing for the Goodies tickets will be put on the site this evening.
Regarding the recording, I've been told that the show will be set in the Goodies office in 2005 (hmm, wonder what type of computer Graeme will have?). The recording is supposed to start at 7:00pm and is anticipated to end around 10:30pm.
NEW GOODIES MERCHANDISE
(Amy Rixon - Goodies-l - 12th October)
The ABC Shops have received 2 new styles of Goodies t-shirts, one mens and one ladies. I will try my best to describe them to you since the new t-shirts have not been put up on the ABC Shop website yet:
The mens style is a bright yellow (very, very bright yellow!) with the words 'The Goodies' on the front. The writing is a slightly different font to the other Goodies t-shirts the ABC Shops sell, which can be seen at:
http://shop.abc.net.au/browse/product.asp?productid=465188 .
On the back is written 'Anything, Anytime, Anywhere' in red and in quite a trendy new font. Sizes range from S to XL and sell for $34.95.
The ladies style is black, also with the words 'The Goodies' on the front with nothing written on the back. This t-shirt is basically the same as the one in picture provided in the link above, just in black and in ladies' sizes. Sizes range from 10 to 16 and are $34.95.
All other Goodies merchandise that the ABC Shops have, such as the original shirts sold at the Goodies 'Still Alive On Stage' show, as well as the pot holder, oven mit, aprons, cap and even the 2nd Goodies DVD, have all been reduced. From my understanding these items are in the October sale that the ABC Shops are having, so there is a chance these prices may go back up after October.
3. 2001 AND A BIT
If you've sighted Tim, Bill or Graeme in a post-Goodies role, e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com> so that we can tell everyone where to spot a Goodie nowadays. Those of you seeking radio & tv alerts between issues of the C&G should consider signing up for the Goodies-L mailing list (more details available on the club website),as our crack (cracked?!) team of reporters attempt to post alerts as the information becomes available.
BILL SPOTTINGS
* There is an article on the Autumnwatch series, including a brief quote from Bill, at: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/4237544.stm
(from information contributed by David Piper-Balston - Goodies-l - 13th Sep)
* From http://www.guardian.co.uk/arts/features/story/0,11710,1569989,00.html :
Peel's box of secrets
A privileged glimpse of the most prized seven-inch records of the late DJ tells you all you need to know about pop: here the White Stripes and Bill Oddie are equal partners
Paul Morley
Sunday September 18, 2005
The Observer
All pop music - and in the old- fashioned sense of 'file under pop', I naturally include everything made since the beginning of the 20th century that eventually turned up on vinyl in a post-Presley context, from Earl Scruggs to Nurse With Wound, and could now be tagged and tamed on an iPod - is fundamentally novelty music. A great pop song springs out of nowhere, sounds like other things but mostly resembles itself, and contains a series of musical and lyrical hooks so irresistible, so packed with slang, lust and alien rhythm, they have a comedic element. A great pop song makes you want to smile, even laugh out loud, at the new way that has been found to condense love, hate, fun and games into music. Pop songs are the invention of a new kind of language, either sonically or grammatically, and a combination of sly gimmickry, bulging confidence and cultish insider knowledge gives them the seductive impact of novelty.
I was thinking this as I flicked through some seven-inch singles, each one humming with blatant and/or hidden history, randomly squeezed inside a battered wooden box that had once belonged to John Peel. The small box of records contained the mysterious, precious songs that had made it through the archival and scholarly vastness of his overall collection and become deeply personal. These were the records he would grab first in an emergency and take to the desert island, as if he was taking life itself with him. I was looking at these discs for a television documentary that will be shown later in the autumn to accompany John's induction into the UK Hall of Fame, and it was a religious experience to see right into the centre of Peel's taste, his enthusiasms, and catch glimpses of his emotional, sentimental, idiosyncratic but ultimately extremely wise and truthful perception of the tricky histories and pleasures of pop.
The clues the collection offer to Peel's version of the history of pop - which has to be the closest to a kind of mystical truth above and beyond the cowardly comforts of fashion, Q magazine and commerce - all point towards ravishing novelty. His favourite discs include the ones you might expect, in that no one has ever heard of them outside of the tiniest, maddest club of experts and aficionados, and the ones you might not expect, in that they're by Status Quo, Sheena Easton or Laurie Anderson. Dozens of records by the Fall all sound like you imagine Peel's soul to sound - where the noisy, giddy novelty of pop, whether blues, rockabilly, psychedelic, punk, soul, Krautrock, dub or skiffle, blazes into the same song again and again in various daft, dangerous and deviant ways. Touching Peel's copy of the Undertones' 'Teenage Kicks' - a cracking example of the novelty pop song as scintillating reportage, where innocence is conveyed as ultimate experience - was somewhere between erotic and intrusive.
Peel's final, and quite fitting, infatuation reveals itself with a tantalising multitude of obscure vinyl singles by the White Stripes, some which seemed to have popped out of the Forties. The White's have a similar subversively curating mind to Peel, and an equally dry, nutty sense of humour, that summarises through look and sound the infinitely spiralling novelty of pop. In Peel's collection there was no contradiction between the Stripes and a more traditional comedy record - Bill Oddie's 'Ilkley Moor Bah 'Tat' was released on Peel's own beautifully stubborn Dandelion label - suggesting that Peel's obsessions were usually with those who have a wildly obsessive understanding of the absurdity of obsession.
The novelty of pop can turn out misshapen and ugly, as evidenced by Phil Collins, Oasis, Simply Red and Coldplay whose flat gag music is the sonic equivalent of people without a sense of humour trying to tell a joke. It can all get a bit Benny Hill or, worse, Mr Blobby - and history will reveal how Antony and the Johnsons owe more to the kind of novelty music that's more Blobby and Benny than the Mothers of Invention or Tim Buckley.
In my own secret hoard, Melanie's 'Brand New Key' and Tommy Cooper's 'Don't Jump Off the Roof, Dad' fit quite snugly with records by Effie Smith, the Mops, Audience, Throbbing Gristle, Pentangle, the Distractions and Kraftwerk, to the extent that it's hard to see where the joke begins and the joke ends - or what, in fact, the joke might be. Whatever it is, it was originally timed to fit on a seven-inch single, and Peel knew the punchline better than anyone.
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 19th September)
* An excerpt from the Independent Online Edition. (The full article can be found at: http://enjoyment.independent.co.uk/music/news/article316357.ece )
Anniversary of much-loved DJ's death sees legacy grow
By Terry Kirby, Chief Reporter
Published: 01 October 2005
The late, lamented John Peel may have been famed for his love of both obscure Japanese thrash metal and punk standards like the Undertones' "Teenage Kicks", but among his most treasured records of all time is one particularly odd piece of vinyl.
It is a recording of Bill Oddie, now the nation's favourite twitcher, singing the Yorkshire folk song, "On Ilkley Moor Bah 'Tat" in the raucous style of Joe Cocker's "With a Little Help From My Friends". Peel kept it in a battered box alongside more than 100 other favourites by artists as varied as Status Quo and the White Stripes.
The novelty album was released on Peel's own short-lived Dandelion record label in 1970 with Oddie backed by Cocker's legendary Grease Band. It was, say Peel's friends, simply typical of the man's eclectic tastes.
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 30th September)
(Editor's note: John Peel was a guest star in The Goodies' "Superstar" special, and was then a "target" for the Goodies in later episodes, most notably in "Daylight Robbery On The Orient Express", where he "bored for Britain", and in "Punky Business" where he was supposedly a blindfolded member of the Trendsetters Ball judging panel.)
* Taken from 'Ham and High 24'.
<http://www.hamhigh.co.uk/content/hamhigh/news/story.aspx?brand=northlondon24&category=newshamhigh&tBrand=northlondon24&tCategory=newshamhigh&itemid=WeED22%20Sep%202005%2017%3A52%3A01%3A750 >
TELEVISION conservationist Bill Oddie this week slammed the lack of psychotherapy for NHS patients in a candid speech about his own bouts of depression.
Britain's most famous twitcher was invited to speak at the annual general meeting of the Tavistock and Portman NHS Trust, on Belsize Lane on Monday.
The former Goodie told how he first suffered clinical depression three years ago. He sank so low, he said, that at one point he even wrote a suicide note.
"The only reason I am still here now is because I can afford to pay for therapy. Most people can't.
"I did go to the Royal Free. The therapist was fine. He was helpful and interesting to talk to, but there is no way you could get enough sessions on the NHS.
"Why did I relapse? Answer: I didn't have any therapy. Maybe I would have just got better without it, but I don't think so."
The TV star said his GP advised him against using mental health services at the Royal Free.
Mr Oddie said: "He told me: 'If you are not mad before you go in, you soon will be.' I had to go privately. I could not have been lower.
"I had no history of anxiety. Cantankerous, acerbic, obstreperous, aggressive? Yes - but never anxious. It came out of the blue."
Mr Oddie was treated at the north London Priory, which he described as 'hideous.'
After his stay was leaked to the press, he moved to the Charter Nightingale hospital in Marylebone, which was 'like the Groucho Club.' He paid £6,000 for 10 days' treatment.
He returned home, stopped therapy and a year-and-a-half later descended to the lowest point of his life.
He said: "I still go to therapy twice a week. I enjoy it. I go and discuss problems, which need decisions. I am at a better place now than I have been in the whole of my life. Mental therapy is my workout. Many people can't have it because it is not available unless you are rich."
His claims are backed by mental health charity SANE, whose helpline takes more than 1,000 calls a week from sufferers.
The charity says 80 per cent of callers are on medication, but only six per cent are receiving therapy.
Marjorie Wallace, founder and chief executive of SANE, said: "Very few of our callers have access to counselling, psychotherapy or anyone to talk to and listen to them.
"Psychotherapy should be available on the NHS as much as doctors and nurses.
"People have to wait nine to 18 months on the NHS for counselling, by which time the crisis is either worse or has disappeared, but there is a lot of suffering in between."
During his speech, Mr Oddie also berated the trust board for its boring meeting.
He said: "If you didn't have depression before this meeting, you would certainly be depressed now."
One audience member praised Mr Oddie's frankness: "It takes an outsider to say the public provision of psychotherapy is absolutely inadequate."
(David Piper-Balston - Goodies-l - 23rd Sep
* "Bill Oddie's How to Watch Wildlife" is being repeated by BBC 2 on Tuesdays at 19:30.
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 25th September)
* Bill's "The Truth about Killer Dinosaurs" has already been scheduled for a repeat. I found it listed on BBC 1 on Tuesday 11th October at 03:55 to 04:55. There was a second airing on Friday 14th October at 03:05 to 04:05; it appears both of these are broadcasts of part 1 (of this two part series).
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 3rd October)
* According to http://www.cubed3.com/news/4382 , Bill Oddie is the host at a promotional event to launce a new Nintendo product.
Here's a cut & paste of the opening paragraphs, where Bill is mentioned:
Nintendogs News | Nintendo in GREAT Marketing Ploy!
Nintendo in most pointless promotional stunt ever shocker...
By James Temperton (Mr. T)
06.10.2005 16:56
There is no doubting that Nintendo firmly believe that nintendogs is going to be one of their most important new franchises ever. The amount of promotion they are throwing behind the European launch is awesome. TV adverts, early store openings and now...'celebrity' parties. Straight from the dog's mouth, so to speak:
To herald its arrival, Nintendo is today (Thursday 6th October) throwing one of the most lavish parties ever seen for virtual or real dogs (as compared to all the other virtual dog parties). The Puppy Party, hosted by all-round animal lover Bill Oddie (worse than Bob Monkhouse for the N64 launch), features dog-loving celebrities Myleene Klass (from defunct pop 'sensation' Hear Say) and Jeremy Edwards (erm...) as well as canine celebrities - Betty from Eastenders and Coronation Street's very own Schmeichel. There'll be dogs-eye video screens, a VIP (very important pooch) (that one is their joke, not ours) chill-out area, doggy Olympics and a doggy disco to round off the get-together with some barking good tunes (stop it now, please).
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 6th October)
* Bill will be hosting a short follow up to Springwatch entitled "Wild Owl Farm" BBC2 Wednesday 26th October 2005 9.50pm-10pm.
"Bill Oddie finds out what's been happening to the remarkable wild barn owl family introduced on Springwatch earlier this year. With unique filming access to the Devon nest site, the whole story of the family's year is revealed, from nesting through to fledging."
(David Piper-Balston - Goodies-l - 13th October)
GRAEME SPOTTINGS
* Graeme is part of the cast of "The Bits In Between", a new four-part radio series starting on BBC Radio 4 on Tuesday 25th October at 23:00.
Here's a blurb from a BBC promotional newsletter:
In this new comedy series, Chris Maynard is a television continuity announcer who is frustrated with his job and his life. It's not just the bits in between programmes that cause problems for Chris, it's those awkward bits between him and his girlfriend, him and his boss, and him and his ego.
In episode one, Chris decides to resign from his job to fulfill his ambition of becoming a writer - but things don't go to plan.
Rhys Thomas stars as Chris Maynard, Charlotte McDougall as Janey and Graeme Garden as Roger, the Head Announcer. This is Ben Edwards's second piece for Radio 4, following on from Bumps And Bruises, his afternoon comedy play set in an ante-natal class.
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 11th October)
* Graeme will be appearing in "Casualty at Holby City" (which is when the two BBC medical dramas set in the same hospital crossover) on BBC1 Wednesday 26th October 2005 in the episode "Test Your Metal"
The show is broadcast Monday to Thursday 7pm-7.30pm so Graeme may well appear in other episodes. This is an unusual time slot and length for the show - maybe it's being converted into an all out soap opera?
(David Piper-Balston - Goodies-l - 13th October)
TIM SPOTTINGS
* Here in Oz there is a new DVD out called 'The best of Marty Feldman'. Tim Brooke-Taylor is in a number of sketches featured on the DVD (the sketches being from the TV show 'At Last The 1948 Show'). One of the funniest sketches included on the DVD with Tim in it is the Bavarian wine treading dance- highly amusing!
(Amy Rixon - Goodies-l - 13th September)
* Repeats of "Golf Clubs with Tim Brooke-Taylor" continue to be shown on Thursdays on Discovery Travel and Living at various times (consult your local listings).
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 25th September)
* Tim Brooke-Taylor will appear in "HeartBeat" on ITV on Sunday 9th October at 20:00.
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 25th September)
* The Telegraph's obituary for Ronnie Barker mentions that Tim & Bill worked with him on "The Frost Report" in the following excerpt. The full article is at http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2005/10/05/db0501.xml&sSheet=/portal/2005/10/05/ixportal.html
It was Jimmy Gilbert, a BBC producer, who recommended Barker for The Frost Report in 1966. David Frost himself suggested Ronnie Corbett, whom he had seen en scene at Danny La Rue's club in London; also appearing in the show were Marty Feldman, Tim Brooke-Taylor, Bill Oddie and John Cleese, who played the upper-class part in sketches with Corbett and Barker satirising, with the aid of their absurdly differing physical statures, the rigidity of British social structure.
Barker later said that he found most of the Frost Report team "rather 'Varsity"; as an old Oxford High man, he presumably caught the scent of "town and gown" in the air.
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 4th October)
I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T A CLUE (ISIHAC) and
I'M SORRY I'LL READ THAT AGAIN (ISIRTA)
* BBC 7 airs old episodes of "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue" (with Tim and Graeme) and "I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again" (with all three Goodies) on Mondays; they are available via Listen Again for six days after broadcast. The shows can be heard worldwide via the internet from www.bbc.co.uk/bbc7
(Lisa Manekofsky - Goodies-l - 25th September)
4. AND NOW … A WALK IN THE BLACK FOREST!
* At the close of tonight's episode of ABC television's "Spicks & Specks", Jade McRae performed a nice rendition of "Funky Gibbon".
Now if only I knew who she was. Apparently her dad co-wrote it, which is as much as I know about her. (I missed the first few minutes of the show, which contained her introductory bio.)
(Bruce Probst - Goodies-l - 28th September)
* That would probably be Dave McRae who did the music with Bill...
He made the Funky Gibbon funky with the synths.
(Miranda Worthington - Goodies-l - 28th September)
* I believe Dave McRae is actually Australian and he lives in Sydney with his wife Joy Yates, who was one of the back-up singers in Goodies Almost Live.
(Alison Bean - Goodies-l - 28th September)
5. COR!! COMICS SYNOPSIS #43
(by Linda Kay)
Issue 178
27th October, 1973 No. 66
In a series like The Goodies in which you have a mad scientist character inventing all kinds of strange things the idea that time travel would eventually come up seems a given. Amazingly the Goodies *never* did any time travelling via a time machine. Some episodes took place in the past or in the future but in those cases the story would just start in that time period. Perhaps the fact the Goodies never did any actual time travelling in their series is the reason the Cor!! comics creators explored the subject not one but *twice* ... this entry being the second of the two.
COVER ARTWORK: The Goodies are featured in a tall panel next to an abbreviated Gus the Gorilla comic. They are sitting in a time machine which is teetering on the head of a dinosaur rising from a swamp. Graeme is pulling on a ship's style lever, Tim is hanging on for dear life and Bill is eyeing his reflection in a rear view mirror through a telescope. The words "Going Up" are above them in mod-70's lettering while a banner below says "See This Week's Goodies Tale!"
Header: THIS STORY OF A TIME MACHINE WILL GO DOWN IN HISTORY, PALS!
The Goodies are in their office and Tim opens the door to an aged Professor who enters carrying what looks like a folding table and some rolled drawings.
PROFESSOR: I'm Professor Crankhandle ... I've invented the world's first TIME MACHINE and I want you chaps to *test* it for me!
GRAEME: AHA! This is the mission I've been *waiting* for!
The Professor unfolds what he has carried in, revealing a flat time machine on springy legs with three seats and several controls and gadgets on it. Graeme inspects the machine with a magnifying glass, looking pleased. Bill and Tim stand to one side looking confused.
GRAEME: A beautiful machine, Professor! I see you have an *inter-connecting grommiter throttle flange!*
PROFESSOR: Yes, indeed! Also *twin thrust* brackets with overhead spinning dynamos ... and ... a *leapfrog suspender unit!*
THE GOODIES CLIMBED ABOARD ...
The machine jerks up and down on its springs as it starts. The Professor (and several well wishers) wave the Goodies goodbye.
GRAEME: Right! Let's get started!
PROFESSOR: Goodbye and good luck!
The machine splashes down in a prehistoric swamp with dinosaurs all around and a volcano in the background.
TIM: *Agh!* We've gone back to *prehistoric times!*
BILL: I might've guessed we'd get *wet!*
A dinosaur rises from the water, lifting the time machine and the Goodies high up into the air to balance precariously on top of its head.
TIM: *Eek!* A *prehistoric monster!* Let's get OUT of here!
BILL: I'll set it to *forward* time.
DINOSAUR: GRAAAH!
The Goodies disappear from the monster's head in a PING!
DINOSAUR: Der ... where did they go?
The trio reappear on flat ground with caves, a saber toothed tiger and Stonehenge around them.
GRAEME: Cor!! I wonder where we are!
TIM: We know *where* we are ... I just wonder *when* we are!
They start to walk around. Unfortunately they don't see a caveman peeking from behind a nearby rock.
BILL: Well, it looks a bit *drier!* Let's have a *look round!*
The caveman climbs on top of the rock and clubs Bill over the head with a primitive stone hammer. Graeme and Tim walk on, not seeing what happened.
GRAEME: H'mmm ... from the landscape I would say this is the latter half of the *mezzanine period!*
BILL: GNNN!
Tim and Graeme finally notice what's happening to Bill when they turn and see the caveman dragging his limp body away by the hair.
TIM: Look! A *cave-man!* He's taking Bill for his *wife!*
They follow the caveman to his home where he's tied Bill to a spit and is trying to start a fire beneath him.
TIM: Gosh! On second thoughts, he's taken him for his *lunch!*
GRAEME: He's using a *flint,* perhaps it's the *melamine* rather than the *mezzanine* period!
Graeme picks up a rock and turns to Tim.
GRAEME: This is where modern science will save the day! Tim ... take off your braces!
Graeme uses Tim's suspenders as a slingshot pulled between two long sticks. He fires the rock at the caveman as Tim looks down at his fallen pants angrily.
GRAEME: FIRE ONE!
The rock hits the caveman on the back of the head, knocking him unconscious as Bill comes to and sees what is happening.
Graeme and Tim each take one end of the pole Bill is tied to and run away as more cavemen come out of the caves, hurling rocks at them.
GRAEME: Back to the time machine!
They reach a gorge so Graeme and Tim lay the pole (and Bill) across the gap and run across as the cavemen continue to chase them and throw rocks.
CAVEMAN: Oy! *Grunt!* Come back wid our dinner!
TIM: Quick! We've got no time to lose!
They reach the time machine and take their seats as Graeme starts it up, the cavemen still throwing rocks from the other side of the gorge.
BILL: Back to the twentieth century, driver ... and make it snappy!
The time machine appears back outside the Goodies office.
GRAEME: Ah, we made it! Back to our dear old office!
They have just settled back in their office when the door opens and the Professor walks in with the time machine in hand and the drawings rolled under his arm.
PROFESSOR: I'm Professor Crankhandle ... I've invented the world's first TIME MACHINE and I want you chaps to *test* it for me!
GRAEME: Oh, dear ... we came back *too early!* We're *back* before we *set off!*
BILL: Oh, no ... not all *that* again!
TIM: At least I can maybe collect my braces next time round!
Sign-Off Line: Take Time Out For Laughs With The Goodies Again Next Week!
RATING (using the BLACK PUDDING RATING SYSTEM):
III - Goody goody yum yum.
There aren't a lot of verbal jokes in this comic and only very few time-related puns or phrases, yet the artwork and overall idea for the comic makes up for this. Oddly enough Graeme proclaims a time machine is just the mission he's been waiting for. He seems to have forgotten he invented a time machine himself back in issue 150!
There are once again a good number of subtle jokes in the artwork to discover. Bill and Graeme are playing cards in the first panel and on the desk next to them is an hourglass, an indication of the time theme that will prevail throughout the story. The clock on the wall shows the time is four minutes to twelve.
The time machine itself contains some interesting gadgetry, including a bicycle horn, a pair of extending prongs on the front, a "tested" sign and various levers. Unfortunately the Professor's word balloon covers much of the machine as Graeme is inspecting it and other drawings of the machine are smaller and not as detailed. As the Professor waves goodbye to the Goodies there is another man waving alongside him, a military man giving them the thumbs up, and a school boy and a baby all appearing from nowhere to see them off. As the time machine starts up several screws go flying from it!
The saber-toothed tiger is startled by the extending prongs on the front of the time machine when it lands. There is a small sign outside of one of the cavemen's caves as well, although it is too small to read. There is also a ladder laying down near Stonehenge.
Tim is, of course, wearing polka-dotted shorts when his pants fall down. The caveman's flint comes in a matchbox. When the Goodies are hurrying over the gorge Tim is holding on to his pants to keep them on. We can see fossils embedded in the cliffs on either side which include skeletal remains, shells, and even an automobile. A tentacle is reaching up out of the gorge toward Bill, who is facing downward and sees it coming. This same tentacle is still reaching up out of the gorge as they hurry back onto the time machine.
When they land back in modern times there is a prehistoric mouse in the extending prongs which lurches toward a very scared cat (the same black and white cat which has appeared in previous issues). And when we see the Goodies back in their office it is only one minute earlier than when the Professor entered the last time.
All in all this is a fun comic and was well worth exploring the subject of time travel yet again.
To view these strips online, you can visit this page:
http://members.aol.com/corcomics
We'll post the currently reviewed issue plus the two previous issues for latecomers.
6. QUIZ & QUOTE ANSWERS
(a) Graeme Garden
(b) Twinkle the cat (aka Kitten Kong)
(c) Kitten Kong
(d) Kenneth
(e) Kenneth the tortoise
(f) Terrapins
(g) Sunny Meadows
(h) 10,000 to 1
YOUR SCORE:
8 Goodies fan supreme
7 Mastermind of the year
5-6 Clever clogs
3-4 Reasonably Goodie
1-2 Thick as old boots
0 Rolf Harris!
NEXT C&G EDITION:
- #120: 12th November 2005.
Special "The Goodies Rule OK" 10th Anniversary Edition
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The Goodies Fan Club Clarion and Globe is copyright The Goodies Rule - OK! 2005. All rights reserved.
Permission to reproduce this work or any section of it, in any form must first be obtained from the copyright holders.
For further information regarding this publication please e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com>.
For other general enquiries about the 'Goodies Rule - OK' fan club or 'The Goodies' itself, please e-mail <enquiries@goodiesruleok.com>
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