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C&G 25 Dec 1997
#25 Dec 1997 - Print Email PDF 
Posted by bretta 21/09/2006

Index

» #25 Dec 1997

 
THE GOODIES CLARION AND GLOBE
 
THE OFFICIAL NEWSLETTER OF 'THE GOODIES RULE - OK' FAN CLUB
 
Issue No. 25                12th December 1997
 
 
            Apologies to you all for this late newsletter. My server was down on and off for almost a week, making it impossible to send or receive e-mail. Anyway we've got lots of good things this month, so I guess it's worth the wait.
 
CONTENTS
 
1. THE TIM BROOKE-TAYLOR INTERVIEW - Part 3
2. BOFFO IDEAS - Club happenings and ideas.
3. SPOTTED!!! - The latest Goodies sightings.
4. GOODIES TRIVIA QUIZ - More brain teasers from David McAnally.
 
 
1. THE TIM BROOKE-TAYLOR INTERVIEW
 - Part 3
 
            More answers to your questions from the man in the Union Jack waistcoat.
 
DO YOU STILL KEEP IN TOUCH WITH BILL, GRAEME AND YOUR 'I'M SORRY I'LL READ THAT AGAIN' AND UNIVERSITY PALS JO KENDALL AND JOHN "OTTO" CLEESE?
 
            Graeme I see regularly as we both appear on the BBC radio panel game 'I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue'. Bill asked me and my wife for a meal next week, but sadly I will have started my panto. Whenever the three of us meet up it's almost as if we were still doing the Goodies.
            John Otto I see every now and then, but not nearly as much as I used to. Jo Kendall I haven't seen for years. David Hatch I see quite often and I'm a godfather to one of his sons.
 
WERE YOU HAPPY PLAYING THE GOLDEN TICKET COMPUTER GUY IN 'WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY'? OR WOULD YOU HAVE RATHER BEEN AN OOMPA LOOMPA?
 
            Doesn't everyone want to be an Oompa Loompa? The scene you refer to was the very last one shot in the film. All the technicians clearly hated the director and couldn't wait to get away. They had their packed suitcases by their feet. We filmed it at the headquarters of Nestle. I was told to only touch one button behind me. "BUT DON'T TOUCH THE OTHERS" they screamed or you will wipe out all of Nestle's files worldwide. I later did a play with the girl who played Miss Veruca in the film, Julie Dawn Cole, and she was excellent.
 
HOW DID YOUR INPUT INTO THE GOODIES CHANGE AFTER THE CREDITS CHANGED FROM "GRAEME GARDEN AND BILL ODDIE WITH TIM BROOKE-TAYLOR" TO JUST "GRAEME GARDEN AND BILL ODDIE"?
 
            I wrote less, as I was writing and performing in other shows. And, modesty apart, they are quicker and better writers than me.
            But the three of us would work out vague story lines and areas for each show with potential scenes and 'jokes', then Bill and Graeme wrote a half each. I would then come in as referee and add or subtract. In fact be a real nuisance.
 
IN THE GOODIES YOU PLAY VERY MUCH A ROYALIST, CONSERVATIVE "LITTLE ENGLANDER". WHAT, IF ANYTHING IS YOUR POLITICS?
 
            I've always tried to avoid this question because I think the performer should keep his personal views to himself. But, since you ask, I have never voted Conservative and couldn't wait to vote for our present Labour party who do seem to represent my views. We were all left of centre. I would say our views were pretty clear in the programmes, not in the characters, but in what we made fun of. The greatest problems was when one of us had to play the Baddie (this happened most weeks) and some not very bright people would think that was the view of the character AND the actor. Having said that I like being British.
 
IN 'FROM FRINGE THE FLYING CIRCUS' A GOODIES MOVIE IS MENTIONED, WHICH APPARENTLY SHOWED THE GOODIES MEETING FOR THE FIRST TIME. THIS MOVIE WAS NEVER MADE, WHY WAS THIS? AND CAN YOU REMEMBER ANY MORE ABOUT THE PLOT ETC.?
 
            This was really a bribe from our publishers who commissioned us to write a Goodies film if we would do another Goodies book. We did write a script but that is all that happened. I'm afraid I can't remember much about it - it was THAT good.
 
HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH THE IDEAS FOR THE GOODIES BOOKS?
 
            A spin off company did a Christmas book for us. It was so awful we decided to do the next one ourselves. It was a hell of a lot of hard work but I'm proud of them. The 'Making of the Goodies Disaster Movie' book didn't quite work as readers would dip in and out whereas we intended the reader to follow it through chronologically, assembling in-jokes as they went along.
 
WAS 'THE MAKING OF THE GOODIES DISASTER MOVIE' IN ANY WAY BASED ON YOUR EXPERIENCES TRYING TO GET A GOODIES FILM MADE?
 
            I can't honestly say yes, much though I'd like to. So, no.
 
ROUGHLY, HOW LONG DID IT TAKE TO MAKE A SINGLE GOODIES EPISODE FROM CONCEPTION TO COMPLETION?
 
            Difficult. Three weeks? We would meet to discuss ideas over say 3 or 4 days. Then all six (assuming a series of six) would be written. Then rewritten. Then into production. We would usually film the exterior shots for the series over 3 or 4 weeks. Before the filming we would sit round a table for three or four days with all the technical people, having broken down scenes into a story board. (See below re visual effects). Then we would work on a weekly basis. Start rehearsals on a Monday and record in front of an audience on the Friday. Our best series in 1975 would be recorded on a Friday and transmitted the following Monday.
 
WHEN GRAEME, BILL AND YOURSELF SAT DOWN TO WRITE EPISODES, DID YOU HAVE A CLEAR IDEA OF HOW THE VARIOUS VISUAL EFFECTS COULD BE REALISED? IF SO, DID YOU WRITE EFFECTS DETAILS INTO SCRIPTS OR WAS THIS SORT OF THING LEFT TO THE VISUAL EFFECTS DESIGNER?
 
            We took pride in working out how an effect could be achieved and would either write it in or talk it through with the production team. Quite often Graeme, or Bill, would draw the effect. Equally the visual effects department took pride in improving our suggestions. The visual effects department were very much the unsung heroes of the BBC. They had to be artistic and practical and work with every other department
 
DID YOU REALLY ENJOY BEING A GOODIE AS MUCH AS YOU LOOK LIKE YOU DID?
 
            Yes and no. The filming, usually was hell. The weather was invariably bad and we were always short of time having to re shape all the time. But it was exciting, and rewarding in the fact that we had control over everything. What am I saying, of course we enjoyed it.
 
WHAT ARE YOUR FAVOURITE(S) AND LEAST FAVOURITE(S) OF THE SONGS WHICH YOU
RECORDED WITH THE GOODIES?
 
            Faves: Wild Thing, Cricklewood, Cactus In My Y Fronts. Least fave: Custard Pie.
 
RECENTLY CANADIAN COMEDIAN MIKE MYERS LISTED THE GOODIES AS ONE OF HIS CHILDHOOD INFLUENCES. SO HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT BEING PARTLY RESPONSIBLE FOR SUCH MOVIES AS 'SO I MARRIED AN AXE MURDERER', 'WAYNE'S WORLD' AND 'AUSTIN POWERS - INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY'?
 
            I saw 'Wayne's World' and thoroughly enjoyed it. Literally the next day I read that Mike Myers had cited us. So I was pleased. I recently saw 'Austin Powers' which I also enjoyed, especially the exaggerated fashions and his Mr Nasty character. I haven't seen or even heard of 'So I Married An Axe Murderer'. Put it this way, if he asked me to appear in one of his films I would leap at it.
 
COULD YOU TELL US ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCES ON 'YOU MUST BE THE HUSBAND?' THIS WAS IN MY HUMBLE OPINION, ONE OF THE FUNNIEST SITCOMS I'VE EVER SEEN FROM THE UK AND YOU HAD A GREAT ON-SCREEN RELATIONSHIP WITH SHEILA STEAFEL.
 
            I loved the first series of 'You Must Be The Husband'. It was beautifully written by Colin Bostock-Smith. Actually it was Diane Keen, who played my wife, I think it was the best on screen relationship. The second series was ruined by an interfering producer who kept steering the writer in the wrong direction. Colin later wrote a stage play with the basic premise which I did with the wonderful Brigit Forsyth (Thelma in 'The Likely Lads'). It was a terrific play which we toured the UK with and then took it to the Far and Middle East where it was also successful. What I liked about the whole thing was that both the husband and wife were bright, witty, nice people (not prats) whose marriage was constantly under threat from outside influences. It was also sometimes quite moving. But it was a sitcom and it did have a sofa. Something that seems to be unfashionable I'm told. It doesn't seem to hold Frasier back though.
 
HAVE YOU EVER MET ANY OF THE ROYAL FAMILY AND IF SO, WHAT DID THEY THINK ABOUT YOU 'MARRYING' PRINCE CHARLES AND CONSTANTLY REQUESTING AN O.B.E.? AND DO YOU STILL WANT AN O.B.E.?
 
            Prince Charles volunteered to play himself in the marriage scene. Unfortunately palace advisers got to him. I met him a few times in the seventies and he was quoted as liking Monty Python but putting the Goodies as his favourite. Consequently I've always liked him. He even put a suggestion to me that we could make a private film for the Royal family. One of his suggestions was people coming out of the palace, after being knighted, covered in bandages and plasters.
 
GINGER SPICE FROM THE SPICE GIRLS IS REALLY INTO WEARING CLOTHES WITH THE UNION JACK ALL OVER THEM. WHAT IS YOUR OPINION OF THIS OBVIOUS PLAGIARISM?
 
            About 1% of the royalties would shut me up.
 
YOU'VE DONE LOTS OF "FROCKING UP" IN VARIOUS COMEDY SHOWS, DO YOU STILL POP ON THE ODD FROCK FOR OLD TIMES SAKE OR HAS AGE AND FATHERHOOD CURBED YOUR EXUBERANCE?
 
            You're right and I seem to be made to do the more difficult female singing roles on 'I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue' eg. Kate Bush's 'Wuthering Heights'. But that's just audibly frocking up. I have to say I liked playing female parts but hated the actual clothes. My sympathies go out to women who have to wear formal clothes.
 
            Got a question for Tim? Well this is your final chance. Send your questions for Tim to carrot@auslink.net by 1st January 1998.
 
 
2. BOFFO IDEAS
 
            You can make it happen here. Liven up the club with a boffo idea for bob-a-job week. Mail carrot@auslink.net with your comments, ideas or suggestions.
 
 
IRC MEETING - T-SHIRTS
 
            Thanks to all those who attended our IRC Meeting on the 24th November. We had a long discussion about all sorts of things Goodies related, but our main discussion was the proposal for a club t-shirt. A design was agreed upon by all those who attended which is as follows:
THE T-SHIRT: A yellow Bonds top (70s style t-shirt) with purple edging.
ON THE FRONT: The Goodies logo and a picture of three men on a trandem.
ON THE BACK: The quote "It's anything you want it to be".
            Hopefully we'll be able to create a design soon, all we need is the three men on a trandem logo, so if anyone can make one or has one, please mail carrot@auslink.net with the details. AND THEN we can find out how much it will cost to have them made.
 
 
IRC MEETING - CONVENTION 2000
 
            We also had a discussion about the proposed Goodies convention in 2000. We'll start seriously looking into this next year, with an IRC meeting for all those interested on being on the convention committee happening soon. So if you'd like to help out with the planning e-mail carrot@auslink.net.
 
 
MELBOURNE GOODIES VIDEO NIGHT - THE SEQUEL! Attend or die!
 
by Nick McCarthy, nm@deakin.edu.au
 
DATE: Saturday, 27th December
TIME: 7pm onwards
LOCATION: 20 Carlinga Drive, Vermont, 3133
            Anyone living in Melbourne is welcome to come. Also, if anyone from interstate happens to be in Melbourne on December 27th (and I presume some people will, since it's between Xmas/New Year) then please come along! The more, the merrier.
            Food and drink will be provided. Yes, there will be alcohol (beer/wine) as an added incentive for people who may be apathetic, yet alcoholic at the same time :) However, supplies will not extend to "soiling level". By that I mean there won't be enough grog for people to start soiling my carpet with various bodily fluids...
            People thinking of coming are quite welcome to bring a friend or two. So, if you're a die hard Goodies freak, a casual Goodies enthusiast, or simply someone who remembers the episode with "the giant kitten", then I want to see *YOU*!
            For simply showing up, you get the following:
* A whole swag of fabulous *uncut* Goodies episodes (including hard-to-come-by episodes and other rare clips/programs featuring the trio)
* Beer, wine, soft drink and wanky nibbly things.
* The crazy company of other like-minded Goodies psychos.
* A chance to laugh at my facial hair.
* There will also be a surprise appearance from Da Prez herself, the glorious Alison Bean, who will open the evening by cutting a red ribbon and doing an erotic strip tease!
            Well okay, I made up the last bit :) However, there are still plenty of good reasons to come along. I'm doing the hard sell here because frankly, not many people attended the last get-together. Therefore, this one is being advertised a lot earlier, so people can get their arses into gear and come along. You don't have to do anything except rock up and have a good time.
            So everyone (Melburnians or otherwise), shed that apathy and attend or I'll shock you in sensitive places with my Ultra Deluxe Demtel Cattle-prod! :) Eat, drink, and piss yourself at the anarchic brilliance of The Goodies (incontinence pads provided). What the hell, just laugh at the very sight of me if you want, but attend!! <NICK PUTS CATTLE PROD ON CHARGE FOR THOSE STILL IN DOUBT>
 
 
HOMEPAGES AND MEMBER'S PROFILES
 
            The new improved homepages are in the process of appearing at our new website: http://auslink.net/~abeanaaa/index.htm  There isn't a lot there at present but all those who have been waiting for their Member's Profiles to appear wait no longer. Travel to http://auslink.net/~abeanaaa/profiles.htm  and ye shall find. Just a quick note though, most of the links are duds at present, but I will fix this within the next week.
            Also coming soon to the all new homepages:
* More pictures of Tim, Bill and Graeme.
* Goodies sounds bytes.
* Brett Allender's Goodies Episode Summaries.
* All the newsletters I haven't had time to put up yet.
* A transcript of the best bits they left out of 'Where Are They Now?'.
* A Goodies theme for Windows 95
            I'll send out a Prune Flash later when these wonderful things start appearing.
 
 
3. SPOTTED!!!
 
            More exciting than getting your wig-spotters badge! If you've seen a Goodie recently, e-mail carrot@auslink.net with the details. Here's where we've Spotted!!! The Goodies this month:
 
 
THE GOODIES ON 'WHERE ARE THEY NOW?'
 
            Australian fans were eager to see the long awaited Goodies appearance on 'Where Are They Now?' on 14th November, but were slightly annoyed to only see 5 minutes of it. Having said that, what we saw was very entertaining.
            There were heaps of clips from all the classic episodes, such as Graeme's "backsliding paper hyenas" speech from 'Radio Goodies', Tim dancing up and down the street as John Revolta from 'Saturday Night Grease' and Bill and the boys singing 'Wild Thing' on 'Top of the Pops'. It was great to see this last clip especially, as it has never been seen on free to air TV in Australia before.
            But the best bit was undoubtedly seeing Tim, Bill and Graeme reminiscing about the show over a few pints (of soft drink) at the pub. Seated at a Union Jack covered table they revealed the following:
 
            Where the idea for The Goodies came from:
GRAEME: It was one of those TV shows of the time like the Avengers and the Defenders and the Protectors. It was all these groups of people with special skills who went out and saved the world and we thought "that's silly".
           
            What The Goodies thought of their characters:
TIM: I deeply despised my character, he was a coward, he was a snob, he was a racist, he was everything. So when people say "it's lovely to see someone playing themselves" I get very depressed about it.
GRAEME: I really admired my character because I thought he had a lot of good ideas, you know, pirate radio stations and turning the world into clowns. I think my character could have saved the world.
 
            What they thought of each other:
BILL: I'm a great fan of both of them. I enjoyed Graeme falling over.
TIM: Yes I did too.
BILL: Coz he's a brilliant faller…I used to look forward to Tim crying.
TIM: That was off the set.
BILL: I think Tim was extremely funny.
TIM: While you're being nice to me, I must say, I'm a great admirer of your music.
BILL: Thankyou.
TIM: People say to us, coz in almost one year - 1975, we became the Spice Girls of the 70s.
 
            What they thought of being the Spice Girls of the 70s:
TIM: I saw a clip of us on 'Top of the Pops' and Graeme and I looked a little bit embarrassed I thought…suddenly you were going into an area where you didn't belong but you were able to be a pop star for a while.
 
            What they think of The Goodies now:
TIM: I'm very, very proud of what we did with The Goodies. And for ten years people couldn't wait to watch the programme and talk about it at work the next day and things like that. And I think just to have been part of that was wonderful.
BILL: Yeah.
 
            Whether they are still friends:
TIM: We had a tiny falling out, but we're one of the few groups in anything who are still friends actually.
BILL: I don't know any others.
 
            And that, apart from Bill singing a bit of the theme song (to the bemusement of Tim and Graeme), was that. Except for the show's host, Peter Luck, reminding us that there was one very famous person who wished he'd been a Goody - Prince Charles. But…
 
 
MOVE OVER PRINCE CHARLES, LANO AND WOODLEY WANT TO BE GOODIES TOO
 
by Nick McCarthy, nm@deakin.edu.au
 
            I was rather pleased to hear a Goodies reference on the JJJ breakfast show with Paul McDermott and Mikey Robbins recently.
            The boys were interviewing Lano and Woodley (Australian comedians) about their current tour and recent television series. Frank remarked that he always wanted to do a sitcom so he could be like The Goodies; that was his ambition :) Paul went on to say that Lano and Woodley couldn't be The Goodies because they were missing a third member- a Bill Oddie.
            Mikey and Paul then asked Lano and Woodley which of the other two Goodies they'd be: either Tim Brooke-Taylor or Graeme Garden. Colin said that someone could also play Graeme's computer :) Then Colin said he liked the episode where Tim called Bill "bill-oddie-stupid" ('The End') and the others agreed, remembering it with affection. Mikey joked that Bill's mum should've realised when she named him, that his name had a pronunciation similar to "bloody".
            It's reassuring to know that even today's high profile comedians remember The Goodies for what it is- the best television comedy in the world.
            (In a further Goodies/Lano and Woodley connection, Bob Spiers, who directed the last couple of series of The Goodies also directed Lano and Woodley's recent TV series - Ed)
 
 
GOODIES IN BRIEF
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            A very brief clip of 'The Goodies' was used for the compilation show 'Pick and Mix', it featured Graeme being attacked by a bat and the clip was just six seconds long. (Sounds like it was from 'Kitten Kong' to me - Ed)
 
 
I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T A CLUE
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            Tony Hawks (who was in the Pilot of 'If I Ruled the World' with Graeme) was the special guest in the episodes of ISIHAC broadcast on 22nd and 29th November. And Colin Sell returned as pianist. The final special guest on ISIHAC was Sandi Toksvig. Her episodes were transmitted on 6th December and 13th December 1997.
            And so that draws to a boombastic close the 31st series (I think!) of 'I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue'.
 
 
GRAEME ON 'WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?'
 
Mark Longmuir, mlon6@student.monash.edu.au
 
            Okay, here's the full list of what Graeme did on an episode of 'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' made in 1988 (the show is a sort of theatre-sports competition, so all these things are made up on the spot).
AUTHORS - contestants tell a story in the style of an author they choose.
The title they were given was "The Sleeping Beauty" and Graeme's author was J.B. Priestly.
STORY - one contestant tells a story and the others perform. The story was 'A Day in the Life of a Rubber Duck' with the moral "A rolling stone gathers no moss" and Graeme was the moss-covered grandfather from whom Keith Richards wouldn't gather the moss.
PROPS - contestants have to come up with lots of uses for a prop. Graeme and his partner had a plastic bendy circle.
PARTY QUIRKS - one contestant, the host, has to guess what the weird quirks given to his guests are. Graeme was the host.
EVERY OTHER LINE - one contestant reads every 2nd line from a play whilst another tries to act out a scene with them. Graeme was acting the scene of a pilot being talked down by mission control, with the other contestant reading lines from 'Hay Fever', and he was aiming for the ending line of "Don't accept gifts from strangers".
AMERICAN MUSICAL - the contestants make up a musical based on the life of an audience member. They were given puberty, making a cup of tea and coming to see a TV show recorded, and Graeme was someone showing people around the TV studio.
            Foxtel's just about nearing the end of their run, so they may choose to go back to the start, in which case the episode could be coming up in a few weeks or so. On the other hand, if they only show the recent episodes again it could be quite a wait...
            For more Whose Line is it Anyway? Info check out Mark's homepage at: http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Lot/8451/  
 
 
GRAEME ON 'HAVE I GOT NEWS FOR YOU'
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            Graeme Garden was the special guest of 'Have I Got News For You' (the comedy news quiz) on 14th November and was on Ian Hislop's team. They were up against Paul Merton (recent ISIHAC guest) and Kirsty Young (Channel 5 news reader). Ian and Graeme's team won 12 points to 11, a real achievement as Ian's team hardly ever wins.
            Speaking of his time with the Goodies on 'Top Of The Pops' (the UK Chart TV Show) he said: "...we were a bit nervous about going on 'Top Of The Pops' us sort of sad old men and we go there and we found that they were all sad old men."
 
 
TIM IN 'ALADDIN'
 
            'Aladdin', the pantomime featuring Tim Brooke-Taylor as Abanazar (the baddy) opened last week at the Theatre Royal, Windsor. Also in the cast are Rebecca Croft (Casey from Home and Away) as Princess Badroulbadour and Hilary Minster (Allo Allo) as the Genie.
            Performances are every Monday to Saturday (no Sunday performances) at 7.30pm or 7.45pm (depending on the day). Matinee performances are either at 2.00pm, 2.30pm or 4.30pm depending on dates. The show continues until Saturday 17th January 1998 and there is no performance 25th December 1997.
            Prices vary from £6-£22.50 with Party discounts (4 people or more) for certain performances (mainly Monday to Thursday except during 22nd December to 3rd January when only Wednesdays have discounts.
            The box office telephone number (within the UK) is 01753 853888 and the address is Theatre Royal, Windsor, Berkshire, SL4 1PS. No E-mail facilities are available. There is also an information line (UK only premium rate - 50p a minute) 0891 323366.
            And if you want to know what to expect (besides all the usual panto stuff of silly songs and cross dressing) Tim reveals, after an exhausting first night: "At the end I go down to Hell through a trap door. I don't think the audience heard but I was shouting 'It's far easier being a Goody'! I'm knackered".
 
 
TIM IN 'THE KENNY EVERETT TELEVISION SHOW'
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            Tim is also popping up quite frequently in 'The Kenny Everett Television Show' being repeated weekdays on the Paramount Channel.
 
 
BILL ON 'THE BEST OF COLLECTOR'S LOT'
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            Bill appeared in 'The Best of Collectors' Lot' on Friday 5th of December. 'Collectors' Lot' is a series that visits collectors homes and Bill opened up the doors of his house, which is adorned with Disney Trinkets.
            It was a very brief piece in which Bill and his wife Laura showed us their collection of Mickey Mouses (or should that be Mickey Mice?) and revealed what he is now seeking is a Mickey Mouse Loo Paper holder with legs (his one is legless, but then it is nearly Christmas.)
 
 
'I'M SORRY I'LL READ THAT AGAIN' - TAPE 4
 
            ISIRTA tape 4 has just been released in Australia. You can pick up a copy for $19.95 at your local ABC Shop or Centre. Look for the purple cover and the photo of John Cleese, Graeme, Bill, David Hatch and Tim strung up on coat-hooks as Jo Kendall looks on.
            This tape features 4 episodes from the series' made in 1970 and 1973. And of note is Episode 2 which contains a mock ad for the Westminster Sub Machine Gun. This was later re-made, with the full visual effect of Bill Oddie as an insane bearded housewife, for The Goodies episode 'The Greenies'.
 
 
GOODIES ON BBC 75 YEARS CD ROM
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            Apparently the Goodies is featured on a special BBC CD-Rom commemorating 75 Years of Broadcasting. Sadly it is not available for sale, it is only available to libraries, schools, universities etc.
 
 
GRAEME IN AIDS DOCO
 
By Stuart Beaton, rastous@auslink.net
 
            I cast my mind back to the heady days of my youth - 1984 - and the stunning new GRID (Gay Related Immune Deficiency) documentary that had GG himself in it....
            Oh, to see him force the hand sized virus into the lining of a huge rectum. The deadpan, dead serious delivery of the deadly message...was this the GG I had watched so many years before? I could hardly believe my eyes as another presenter rolled a condom onto a plastic willy... and GG saying "this could save your life!"
            How many lives were ruined as a result? People madly rolling French letters over a dildo, just to be safe, and then bonking unprotected...?
            Ah, the sweet joys of youth. It's wasted on the young!
 
 
TIM IN 'ONE FOOT IN THE GRAVE'
 
by David Balston, david.balston@virgin.net
 
            The 'One Foot in the Grave' Christmas Special (with Tim Brooke-Taylor as Derek McVitie) will be transmitted on BBC1 on Christmas day from 9pm to 10.10pm.
 
 
4. GOODIES TRIVIA QUIZ
 
by quizmaster David McAnally dsm@maths.uq.edu.au
 
1. Which very expensive items, being offered as a swap for packets of Razz soap powder, were refused by Tim (as a Pepperpot) in 'Cecily'?
 
2. What did Bill complain about in 'Lighthouse Keeping Loonies'?
 
3. What do the initials: 'A', 'B', 'C' and 'D' stand for - according to Graeme in 'It Might As Well Be String'?
 
*** Special Christmas Question ***
 
4. John Cleese and The Goodies appeared in a Radio 4 Christmas Pantomime called 'Black Cinderella II Goes East'. John Cleese played the Fairy Godperson. What roles did The Goodies play?
 
ANSWERS TO LAST MONTH'S QUESTIONS
 
1. How did Nasty Person discover that the Goodies weren't real sailors in 'The Lost Island of Munga'?
 
A: When they couldn't sing the lowest note in 'There is Nothing Like a Dame' - something which, according to Nasty Person, *every* sailor could, or should, be able to do.
 
2. Who were the former inhabitants of the cell the Goodies were incarcerated in during 'Goodies in the Nick'?
 
A: The Queen and Prince Phillip.
 
3. Which book was Graeme reading in 'Movies'?
 
A: 'The Goodies File'.
 
4. What was the final Scout badge Graeme and Bill wanted? And who were the only three people who'd managed to get one previously?
 
A: The 'World Domination' badge.
 
 
THE END
 
            That's it for this month. I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year and/or Happy Hanukkah. I leave you with the following cheery Goodies Christmas quotes:
 
"Christmas' come and Christmas' go, they're all the ruddy same. No-one remembers them do they?"
            - Bill in 'Earthanasia'
 
"Christmas! Nobody ever enjoys Christmas, it's a miserable time. They watch far too much television, get bored stiff, have big family rows, then they feed themselves and get sick as pigs! Season of goodwill? Good swill, more like! <PICKS UP A CASK OF WINE AND SKULLS IT>"
            - Tim (after shedding his inhibitions) in 'Earthanasia'
 
Seasons Greetings,
 
Alison Bean
carrot@auslink.net
 
*********************************************
DISCLAIMER
This is an archive newsletter of The Goodies Rule - OK! International Fan Club (copyright The Goodies Rule - OK! 1997). Some of the information in this newsletter may now be incorrect. Current information can be obtained from http://www.goodiesruleok.com
*********************************************



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