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C&G 150 May 2008
May 2008 - Print Email PDF 
Posted by bretta 19/05/2008

Index

» May 2008

       **********************************************
       *   THE GOODIES FAN CLUB CLARION AND GLOBE   *
       **********************************************
 
 
    * THE OFFICIAL NEWSLETTER OF 'THE GOODIES RULE - OK!' *
             (http://www.goodiesruleok.com)
 
 
Issue No. 150                   12th May 2008
 
 
THE LADS AND LASSES OF THE C&G
******************************
 
EDITOR
- Brett Allender <clarion@goodiesruleok.com>
 
ACE REPORTER:
- Lisa Manekofsky
 
FEATURE ARTICLE CONTRIBUTORS:
- Lisa Manekofsky & Wahski
 
C&G CONTRIBUTORS:
- Tim Chmielewski, Michael Shaw, Michael Cahill, Donna Hutchings, Sosia, bushbaby, punheaven, Jenny_Gibbon, Amanda Stokes, Daniel Bowen
 
CONTENTS
********
 
1. QUIZ & QUOTE - Goodies brainteasers for you and you and you
2. BOFFO IDEAS – The latest club news and happenings
3. SPOTTED!!! - The latest Goodies sightings.
4. 2001 AND A BIT - Tim, Graeme and Bill sightings post-Goodies.
5. FEATURE ARTICLE 1 – From The Archives – Here We Are – At Last
6. FEATURE ARTICLE 2 (Part 1) – Goodies Imaginary Pinball Machine
7. GOODIES CROSSWORD
8. QUIZ & QUOTE ANSWERS
 
 
1. QUIZ & QUOTE
***************
(by "Magnus Magnesium")
 
QUOTE: "Oh that's what it's for. I've just posted two letters in that."
 
(a) Which Goodie says this quote?
(b) What has he posted his letters in?
(c) Which episode is this quote from?
 
QUIZ: This month's questions are from the episode "Snooze".
 
(d) Which show is on Graeme's radio when he destroys it with an automated hammer?
(e) What is the original name of Snooze bedtime drink?
(f) What is Graeme's response to Bill saying "I've done a jingle."
(g) Which Goodie initially wanders off on a lengthy and eventful sleepwalk?
(h) What problem does Graeme encounter when trying to test his antidote?
 
The answers are listed at the end of this newsletter.
 
 
2. BOFFO IDEAS
**************
 
You can make it happen here. Liven up the club with a boffo idea for bob-a-job week. E-mail <enquiries@goodiesruleok.com> with your comments, ideas or suggestions - meanwhile these are the boffo ideas which our club has been working on this month:
 
A MINI-MILESTONE FOR THE C&G
 
A warm welcome to all Goodies fans to the 150th edition of the Goodies Clarion & Globe newsletter. The Goodies Rule OK fan club was founded by Alison Bean in November 1995 and the monthly newsletter has been a constant fixture ever since then, providing all of the news about The Goodies and Tim, Bill and Graeme's solo projects as well as feature articles, puzzles and plenty of other fun stuff.
 
Thank you to all fan club members, both long-term and recent, for your ongoing support and contributions to the C&G and to the club in general. Special thanks in particular to Lisa Manekofsky for the power of Goodies news items which she invariably contributes to every edition, to regular contributors like Linda Kay, Wackywales, Denise Baran-Unland and the Goodies-l crew, and also to Tim Brooke-Taylor and Graeme Garden for their willingness in responding to fan's questions for the C&G on several occasions and for their support of the newsletter in general.
 
 
ASK A GOODIE QUESTION
 
We were hoping to be able to include a Q&A session with Tim and Graeme as part of this 150th edition, however the recent passing of their long-time radio colleague Humphrey Lyttelton has meant that this will be delayed for now. All readers questions have been passed on to Tim and Graeme and hopefully we'll be able to publish their replies in the near future.
 
 
WEBSITE POLLS
 
Last month's poll turned out to be a real one-horse race – it seems as though when it comes to the prospect of new Goodies material, most people would be happy to get their Goodies fix any way they can.
 
Would you want to see a new version of "The Goodies" with Tim, Graeme & Bill, even if it had to be done in a different format/media due to physical limitations?
- yes, in any form                  154 votes
- yes, on television                 49 votes
- yes, on radio                       9 votes
- yes, as an animated show           18 votes
- undecided                           8 votes
- no                                  9 votes
- only if Rolf Harris was involved   31 votes
Total:                              278 votes
 
This month we're looking at the musical side of The Goodies, namely:
 
Many Goodies episodes feature the trio performing as a musical act. Which is your favourite? (Use the comments to suggest others not on this list).
- The Music Lovers (The Stolen Musicians)
- Superstar
- The Goodies Rule - OK?
- The Goodies - Almost Live
- Hype Pressure
- Punky Business
- Saturday Night Grease
- Holidays
- other
- I prefer "The Best of Rolf Harris"
 
So before you put on your carrot undies, squeeze into your tightest pair of jeans and strut off down the street to be thrown out of yet another disco, strut on over to the website first and cast your vote. You know it makes sense!
 
 
3. SPOTTED!!!
*************
 
More exciting than getting your wig-spotters badge! If you've seen the Goodies recently, e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com> with the details. Here's where we've Spotted!!! the Goodies this month:
 
"A RECORD OR AN OBE" REVIEW
(Tim Chmielewski – 14th Apr))
 
A Record or an OBE
Trades Hall, Tuesday 25th March 2008
Starring Ben McKenzie as Graeme Garden and Rob Lloyd as Tim Brooke-Taylor
 
What would have happened if Bill had decided to call it quits in 1975, at the height of the Goodies fame? Tim and Graeme are about to find out in a show that reminded me quite a lot of some classic "stuck in a room" episodes of the show such as Earthanasia amongst others.
It is more of a drama than a comedy but does have quite a few funny moments through the story and the new concept Tim and Graeme end up developing for the new series was funny.
There are quite a few musical references and even a classic ad-break, which help break up the show nicely. I thought the two characters worked well together within the story and are not overplayed.
Strangely enough, this show makes a perfect companion to Andrew McLelland's Guide to Being a Modern Gentlemen, which I ended up seeing on the same night.
I would recommend this show to Goodies fans and people wanting to see something different than a normal stand-up show.
 
Rating: Three black puddings (Goody goody yum yum)
--
Melbourne Gig/Event Photos
 
 
LWT SERIES DVD
(Lisa Manekofsky – 18th Apr)
 
The DVD listing has been updated to show a new cover and a title - "The Goodies - The Last Episodes". Both the ABC Shop and EzyDVD list a May 14th release date.
http://shop.abc.net.au/browse/product.asp?productid=753304
http://www.ezydvd.com.au/item.zml/799547
 
 
EVERYBODY DO THE BOUNCE!
(Lisa Manekofsky – 29th Apr)
 
Sun, 4 May - "The Goodies" episode "Charity Bounce" is being repeated by The Comedy Channel in Australia at 10:30pm. Details about episodes coming up in the next 7 days can be found on their website at http://www.comedychannel.com.au/WhatsOn/Detail.aspx?id=211  . Please also watch your local listings and let us know if you spot additional episodes.
 
 
GOODIES SCREENINGS
 
* Thanks to Jenny_Gibbon for reporting in the club forums that Paramount Comedy 2 in the UK will be showing repeats of "The Goodies" on Monday, May 19th at 21.00 & 21.30. (Lisa Manekofsky)
 
* My Sky planner is showing a further two episodes of The Goodies, showing on Paramount Comedy 2 at 21.00/21.30 BST on Monday next, 19 May. They are repeated on this channel at 24.00/00.30. They are also showing on Paramount Comedy 2+1 at 22.00/22.30 and also presumably being repeated here one hour behind the main channel. (Michael Cahill – 12th May)
 
 
* Sun, 18 May - "The Goodies" episode "The Baddies" is being repeated by The Comedy Channel in Australia at 10:00pm. Details about episodes coming up in the next 7 days can be found on their website at http://www.comedychannel.com.au/WhatsOn/Detail.aspx?id=211  . Please also watch your local listings and let us know if you spot additional episodes.
(Lisa Manekofsky – 15th May)
 
 
4. 2001 AND A BIT
*****************
 
If you've sighted Tim, Bill or Graeme in a post-Goodies role, e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com> so that we can tell everyone where to spot a Goodie nowadays. Those of you seeking radio and tv alerts between issues of the C&G should consider signing up for the Goodies-l mailing list (more details available on the club website), as our crack (cracked?!) team of reporters attempt to post alerts as the information becomes available.
 
** (All items in this section contributed by Lisa Manekofsky, except where otherwise credited) **
 
 
BILL SPOTTINGS
 
* Fri, 2 May - "Natural World - The Eagle Has Landed" is a documentary narrated by Bill Oddie. It airs on UKTV Gardens at 19:00 and again at 23:00 (plus several times the following two days - please check your local listings).
(29th Apr)
 
 
* Mon, 5 May - episodes of "Bill Oddie Goes Wild" and "Birding with Bill Oddie" are repeated throughout the day on UKTV Gardens.
(29th Apr)
 
 
* Weds, 7 May through Fri, 9 May - A past series of "Springwatch" with Bill Oddie is being repeated on UKTV Gardens at 11:00 and 15:00 daily.
(29th Apr)
 
 
* Mon-Thurs evenings starting Mon, 26 May - the news series of "Springwatch" with Bill Oddie will begin on BBC 2.
(29th Apr)
 
 
* Fridays - "Bill Oddie's Wild Side" is getting a repeat run on BBC 1 early Friday mornings. According to the current listings the next two repeats are scheduled for 1:40am on 2 May and 02:25 am on 9 May. However, please consult your local listings to confirm the times.
(29th Apr)
 
 
* When I looked at next week's television programs in the TV Week, I saw Star Portraits with Rolf Harris featuring Bill Oddie listed for 20th May, ABC at 8pm.
Fingers crossed we actually see it this time!
(Amanda Stokes – 13th May)
 
 
* ABC 1 Australia will broadcast the Star Portraits (hosted by Rolf Harris) episode with Bill in it next Tuesday at 8pm.
(Daniel Bowen – 15th May)
 
 
* Mon, 19 May - "100 Years of Wildlife Films", presented by Bill, is being repeated on BBC 4 at 21:00 and then again on Tues, 20 May at 01:05.
(15th May)
 
 
* Sat, 24 May - "Gardeners' World" on UKTV Gardens includes an appearance from Bill. The show will air at 17:00 and 22:00, with another
repeat at 09:00 on Sun, 25 May.
(15th May)
 
 
GRAEME SPOTTINGS
 
* Graeme will appear in the Saturday, May 3rd edition of BBC 7's "I Did It My Way". The show will air from 9am-noon, with repeats at 8pm and 3am (Sunday morning). The show can be heard worldwide from www.bbc.co.uk/bbc7. It should be available from their Listen Again service for a week after broadcast; we'll post that URL when it becomes available.
Here's the listing for the show: "The writer and performer talks to Peter Reed about his radio life and times. Graeme recalls his early career from working with the likes of John Cleese, to becoming part of the hugely successful antidote to panel games, plus The Goodies. Featuring I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again: Jack the Ripper (11/11/1973); Giles Wemmbley Hogg Goes Off: New Zealand (19/11/2003); I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue (18/06/01); Hamish and Dougal: You'll Have Had Your Tea. Series 3 Episode 6 and Spy Nozy and the poets (22/02/2001)."
(28th Apr)
 
 
* BBC 7 is again repeating the second series of "The Right Time" on Sundays; Graeme appeared in some episodes of this sketch comedy series. Each episode is available for a week after broadcast from Listen Again at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/networks/bbc7/aod.shtml?bbc7/right_time  
(29th Apr)
 
 
* date TBD - "Would I Lie To You?" - Thanks to punheaven for noting that Graeme is scheduled to appear in an upcoming episode of this panel show.
(29th Apr)
 
 
* According to an Oxford Mail article at http://www.oxfordmail.net/news/headlines/display.var.2261251.0.lots_of_goodie_goes_on_offer.php , Graeme will be taking part in an Oxford area arts festival in the village of Leafield. His session, "An Evening with Graeme Garden", will be held on Friday, June 6th at 8pm at St Michael's Church. Tickets are £6; they can be booked by calling 01993 878000.
(10th May)
 
 
* Sat, 24 May - "Whose Line is It Anyway?" is another repeat of Graeme's appearance from the first series of the show. It'll air on Dave at 19:00 and again the next day, Sun 25 May, at 14:00.
(15th May)
 
 
* Mondays - "The Unbelievable Truth" returns for a second series on BBC Radio 4 at 18:30. The show will be available online at www.bbc.co.uk/radio4 and for a week after broadcast from Listen Again at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/networks/radio4/aod.shtml?radio4/unbelievabletruth .
(15th May)
 
 
 
I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T A CLUE (ISIHAC) and
I'M SORRY I'LL READ THAT AGAIN (ISIRTA)
 
* Mondays - "I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again" with Tim, Graeme & Bill is being repeated on BBC7 at 12.30pm and 7.30pm. The show can be heard worldwide via the internet from www.bbc.co.uk/bbc7 ; each episode will be available for a week after broadcast from Listen Again at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/networks/bbc7/aod.shtml?bbc7/sorryreadthatagain  
(29th Apr)
 
 
* Saturdays - "I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again", on ABC Radio National at 5:30. This 1960's sketch comedy series starred with all three Goodies plus John Cleese, Jo Kendall, & David Hatch (info at http://www.abc.net.au/rn/comedy/default.htm )
(29th Apr)
 
 
HUMPHREY LYTTELTON – 1921-2008
(from information contributed by Lisa Manekofsky, Michael Shaw, Michael Cahill & Donna Hutchings - 26-28th Apr)
 
His passing is very sad news. At least it is some comfort to know he lived such a long and happy life. The following has been posted on Humph's official website:
 
 **********************
Humphrey Lyttelton 1921 - 2008
 
Humph died peacefully with his family and friends around him on April 25th at 7.00pm following surgery.
We would like to thank everyone for their support and express our deep gratitude to the staff of Barnet General for the care that they gave Humph.
If you would like to leave a message or tribute on this site please click on http://www.humphreylyttelton.com/contact
**********************
 
A BBC News item can be found at http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7367385.stm  
 
An article on the Telegraph's website (at http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2008/04/26/nlyttelton126.xml  ) includes comments from Graeme. Here is a cut & paste of that article:
 
Humphrey Lyttelton, veteran broadcaster, dies
By Gary Cleland and Laura Clout
Last Updated: 2:44am BST 26/04/2008
 
Humphrey Lyttelton, the jazz musician and presenter of Radio 4 comedy panel show I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, has died. He was 86.
Known as "Humph", the jazz band leader, trumpet player and master of innuendo died following surgery to repair an aortic aneurysm after being admitted to Barnet General Hospital in north London on April 16.
A statement released on his website said: "Humph died peacefully with his family and friends around him on April 25 at 7pm following surgery.
"We would like to thank everyone for their support and express our deep gratitude to the staff of Barnet General for the care that they gave Humph."
Dr Graeme Garden, the former Goodie and regular on the panel show, told the Daily Telegraph last night: "He was on sparkling form a few weeks ago when we last worked together. We also spoke just before his operation. He was a great guy.
"He was an immensely loveable man and we are absolutely shattered by the news.
"You would be chatting to him and he would start telling anecdotes about Louis Armstrong or Duke Ellington, both of whom he worked with.
"He had an amazing energy and get up and go. He only gave up his jazz programme this year, at the age of 86, because he wanted to devote more time to other projects - not because he was scaling back.
"He was a great advocate of silliness. Last time I spoke to him he had just watched Hell's a Poppin' on DVD - it is a comfort to know his sense of silliness endured till the end."
Lyttelton had hosted the "self-styled antidote to panel games" from 1972, but was perhaps best known over his lifetime as a musician.
Mark Damazer, the controller of Radio 4, said Lyttelton encompassed "so many" of the virtues people wanted from Radio Four comedy.
"He's just a colossally good broadcaster and possessed of this fantastic sense of timing," he said.
"It's a very, very sad day but we should celebrate and be very grateful for how much he did for Radio Four because he really was one of the giants over the last 40 years, really terrific."
Jenny Abramsky, Director of Audio and Music at the corporation, said: "Humphrey Lyttelton has been one of the wonders of radio broadcasting for years.
"He championed British jazz with his weekly programme on Radio 2 introducing millions of listeners to the glories of the British jazz scene.
"At the same time his deadpan stewardship of I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, the unique ringmaster of an anarchic world, ensured the programme became the jewel of radio comedy.
"Humph was warm, erudite, funny and scurrilous. His audience loved him. He was an irreplaceable voice on British radio."
Lyttelton was born on May 23, 1921 at Eton College, where his father was a housemaster. It was while at Eton that he developed a love for jazz and, in 1936, having taught himself the trumpet, formed his first quartet with schoolmates including journalist Ludovic Kennedy.
After leaving school he served with the Grenadier Guards during the war before going to Camberwell Art College in central London.
It was from here that the extent of Lyttelton's versatility started to become clear.
In 1949 he joined the Daily Mail as a cartoonist, working, among other projects, on the popular Flook strip, and stayed there until 1956.
He was also emerging as a key figure in the British revival of traditional jazz forms.
In 1956, he became the first British jazz artist to enter the top 20 with Bad Penny Blues.
That same year his Lyttelton Band supported jazz legend Louis Armstrong in London, while 45 years after that he worked with the rock group Radiohead, and the following year advised Jamie Cullum on his album.
He began his four-decade stint hosting Radio 2's The Best Of Jazz in 1967, beginning I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue five years later.
As chairman, he became legendary for his ability to deliver the smuttiest of innuendoes with apparent innocence.
Lyttelton announced in March that he was to stop presenting BBC Radio 2's Best of Jazz after 40 years.
Jon Naismith, the producer of I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, last week announced the cancellation of the upcoming series because of Lyttelton's hospitalisation.
 
 Father-of-four Lyttleton, who was long-standing president of the Society For Italic Handwriting, married twice, first in 1948 and then again following a divorce in 1952.
 
------------
 
As a tribute to Humph, BBC Radio 4 will be repeating a vintage episode of "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue" on Sunday, April 27th at noon. The episode is from the Theatre Royal in Brighton, with Barry Cryer, Graeme Garden, Willie Rushton and Tim-Brooke Taylor. It can be heard online from www.bbc.co.uk/radio4
Following are links to some of the many articles about Humph that have appeared over the past two days. They are in no particular order.
 
Humph's life in pictures from the BBC website:
The Independent:
Tribute to Humph on BBC website (3 1/2 minute video):
This is London:
The Times Online:
The AP:
The Daily Mail:
AOL News:
The Mirror:
The Telegraph:
The Guardian: "Humphrey Lyttelton: In his own words"
An interesting blog:
The Guardian:
Chortle:
 
 
------------
 
* The classic episode of "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue" which was repeated yesterday on BBC Radio 4 can be heard from Listen Again at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/networks/radio4/aod.shtml? radio4/cluespecial
This is a 1995 episode from the Theatre Royal in Brighton with regulars Barry Cryer, Graeme Garden, Willie Rushton and Tim-Brooke.
Thanks to Sosia for reporting in the club forums that BBC Radio 4's tribute to Humphrey Lyttelton will air this coming Wednesday morning at 9:00 a.m. 
Also thanks to club member bushbaby for posting the following in the forums: "There's a special bit on Last Word on Radio 4- they added an extra bit on to today's repeat for Humph".
Also according to an article in today's Times Online - (http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/music/article3822583.ece  ), a record setting kazoo band lead by Humphrey Lyttelton at the "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue" date in London earlier this month might make it into the Guinness Book of World Records. (27th Apr)
 
* The Listen Again link for "Humphrey Lyttelton: A Celebration", which aired on BBC Radio 4 this morning, is http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/networks/radio4/aod.shtml?radio4/humphreylyttelton_acelebration    The show is scheduled to be repeated on Radio 4 this evening at 9:30pm - it can be heard online during the broadcast at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/  (30th Apr)
 
* The BBC Radio 3 show "Jazz Line-Up" will include a tribute to Humph on this Saturday's (May 3rd) show, which airs from 16:00 - 17:30. It can be heard online from the station's website and should be available after broadcast from http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio3/jazzlineup/  Radio Two will also be presenting Humph tributes, according to an article from Music Week (at http://www.musicweek.com/story.asp?sectioncode=1&storycode=1034114&c=1 )
(1st May)
 
* According to The Officially Unofficial I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Web Pages (www.isihac.co.uk ), the tribute show by the ISIHAC teams originally announced for this coming Sunday will now be part of BBC Radio 4's Humphrey Lyttelton Day on Sunday 15th June. The show is called "Chairman Humph – a Tribute" and will start at noon. (7th May)
 
* Mon, 26 May - "Tribute to Humphrey Lyttelton" on BBC Radio 2 at 21:00. Here's a listing: "As a tribute to the late jazz great and broadcasting legend, Humphrey Lyttelton, another chance to hear the programme in which Courtney Pine celebrated the trumpeter's 80th birthday. Including specially recorded greetings from friends and colleagues." (15th May)
 
* Sun, 15 June - BBC Radio 4 will be presenting Humphrey Lyttelton Day, which will include a series of tributes including one from the "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue" team. More details will be added when they become available. (15th May)
 
* Sat, 24 May - "Jazz Record Requests" will be a special edition with listeners' requests saluting the late Humphrey Lyttelton. The show will air on BBC Radio Three at 17:30 to 18:30. (15th May)
 
 
ISIHAC MERCHANDISE
 
* The New Uxbridge English Dictionary's publication date was yesterday (May 6th). Amazon.co.uk currently is reporting a 1-2 week delay before they'll have the books in stock. http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-New-Uxbridge-English-Dictionary/dp/0007263937/  (7th May)
 
 
* "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Collection 3" was released on March 3rd. This is a boxed set of the previously released volumes 7, 8, & 9 (each of which is a 2 CD set). http://www.amazon.co.uk/Im-Sorry-Havent-Clue-Collection/dp/0563510420/
(7th May)
 
 
* "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Live Vol. 2" is a 2 CD set scheduled for release on July 10th. This release has been scheduled for a while; I forgot to mention it to the fan club when I first noticed it. I wanted to ensure people didn't think this is a new item being rushed out due to Humph having passed away.
This will be like ISIHAC Live Vol. 1, as explained in the official blurb (from http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sorry-Havent-Clue-Live-Collection/dp/140568836X/ ): "This is a second volume of two specially compiled, extended-length shows from Jon Naismith's production archive, featuring out-takes, ad libs and audience interaction from the Clue team. Taken from the early 1990s, these shows (edition dates t.b.c.) feature the classic Clue line up of Humphrey Lyttelton, Graeme Garden, Barry Cryer, Tim Brooke-Taylor, Jeremy Hardy and the much-missed Willie Rushton. It may contain swearing." (7th May)
 
 
* Amazon.co.uk has updated their description for the book, "The Doings of Hamish and Dougal: You'll Have Had Your Tea?", which is scheduled to be published on August 28th. The listing (at http://www.amazon.co.uk/Doings-Hamish-Dougal-Youll-Have/dp/1848090234/ ) now includes an image of the book's cover and a rather entertaining description. (7th May)
 
 
5. FEATURE ARTICLE 1
********************
(contributed by Lisa Manekofsky)
 
From the Archives:
 
The following article about Tim's pre-Goodies series "At Last the 1948 Show" appeared in the TV Times March 18-24, 1967.
 
Here we are – At Last!
 
By Tim Brooke-Taylor, John Cleese, Graham Chapman and Marty Feldman
 
Here we are. Another "TV Times" bargain offer. Us. Fully guaranteed and turpentine tested. Now why (you may ask) should we offer this epic to such a noble magazine. The answer is as simple as it is sickly: vanity. There can be nothing more enriching than to see our opinions inscribed all over the popular press. Really we wanted to take over "The Times", but Lord Thomson outflanked us, outbid us, and finally out threw us. Now read on…P.S. Tivvy is a five-letter word.
 
Why are you reading this article? Haven't you got anything better to do? In the three minutes that it takes you to get through this you could have been doing something far more useful.
 
You could have played Chopin's Minute Waltz three times, or six times if you played it very fast; you could have overcooked a two minute egg, or run a three minute mile, thereby breaking a world record – which can't be bad.
 
Even in the 20 seconds that it has taken you to read this far, you could have looked at your watch for almost half a minute or found out that you should know about Wales.    But as you've wasted half a minute already, you might as well read the rest.
 
One of the questions we are always being asked is why did you call your show "At Last the 1948 Show". Other questions we are always being asked are "Excuse me, have you got a light?" "Guilty or not guilty" and "Who is Dermot Staveacre?"
 
The answers to these questions can be found in our forthcoming book, "The Amazing Adventures of Captain Gladys Stoatpamphlet and her Intrepid Spaniel Stig, among the Giant Pygmies of Corsica," Volume III, which will be sent on request in a plain, sealed envelope (state name and age when ordering).
 
Now the object of this article is to be informative and chatty so here are a few tit-bits of gossip about ourselves…
 
John Cleese is as arrogant as he seems; has pretensions to being tall, and despite his intense butterfly mind knows all the stations on the Piccadilly Line by heart. He owns a fine leather rhinoceros and a sunray lamp.
 
As an actor he can take criticism but prefers not to. His only ambition is to make this a better world to live in, and then take it over and run it.
 
What can one say of Graham Chapman that has not been said already? Almost anything. Aggressively humble, attractively obstinate with a tendency to mutter to himself in corners.
 
With his extremely active and busy life he says he needs only one hour's sleep a night – but takes 10 to be on the safe side. He likes to climb mountains and large rocks and is a keen amateur faller. He believes the meek will inherit the earth and is standing about ready to collect.
 
Which brings us up to Tim Brooke-Taylor, a good place to be. A coward who dreams a lot; when it's a good dream he gets scared a little; when it's a bad dream you can hear him in Spain.
 
Not conventionally pretty, he nevertheless has a certain animal magnetism, the certain animal being a mouse. He is unbelievably unmarried but is open to offers. Applicants should be young, fantastically attractive and female – but not in that order.
 
Last and by all means least, Marty Feldman, the singing goblin of fun who wears bizarre clothes that make trendy people look like an afternoon tea party, and who uses colourful Cockney expressions that even the colourful Cockneys find hard to understand.
 
He makes pathetic claims to be Anastasia, but does play a giddy trumpet. If he could have his life all over again he would like to be Hayley Mills.
 
Ambitions for all four: to be clues in the "TV Times" Crossword.
 
Here is a test to find out whether you would enjoy watching "At Last the 1948 Show".
 
   1. What was the prize exhibit at the Great Exhibition of 1851?
          a. The Stoat House
          b. Electric Pyjamas
          c. Queen Victoria
 
   2. Who of these three is the most likely to have invented plastic?
          a. Dermot Staveacre
          b. Cardinal Richelieu
          c. Arthur Stoat
 
   3. Which of these three animals is considered to be larger than a weasel? (Be careful.)
          a. Stoat
          b. Stoat
          c. A big stoat
 
ANSWERS:
   1. a, 10 pts. b, 5 pts. c, 1 pt.
   2. a, 5 pts. b, 1 pt. c, 10 pts.
   3. a, 1 pt. b, 10 pts. c, 5 pts.
 
Now add up your total score, multiply it by two, add 10, halve it and subtract your original score. If you are left with five then you will enjoy "At Last the 1948 Show" immensely. If you are left with a score of four or under or six or over, then please send us your name and address and we will come round and beat you up.
 
 
6. FEATURE ARTICLE 2
********************
 
GOODIES IMAGINARY PINBALL MACHINE (Part 1)
 
While going through some old discs I re-stumbled across something I got hold of a number of years ago (mid 90s) from a friend of a friend etc who initially wrote the document.
 
For those of you who remember .... a few years back it was a popular pastime for some people to put money into this giant light flashing electronic noisy box, and you would press these buttons called flippers on the side, in an attempt to hit a shiny silver ball to stop it going down the middle and sides.
 
A number of these "pinball" machines were released based on a theme of some kind, whether it was a music group, a movie or TV show. eg: there were Star Wars, Dr Who, Flash Gordon or Elvira, Rolling Stones, KISS, Evel Knievel, Star Trek and Knight Rider pinball machines.
 
Although one was never manufactured, a person who designs pinball machines, produced a document which describes how they would go about creating a Goodies pinball machine:
 
Rules of imaginary Goodies machine
Version 1.2   (12/November/1993)
By: Cameron Silver
 
Playfield Description
(All game features will be explained in RULES)
 
From bottom left in a clockwise direction.
 
Flippers/sling-shots - The usual type. The Inlanes (when lit) spot a letter in Goodies, and the outlanes re-light Start Job for the next ball. Only one lane is lit at a time - use the flipper buttons to move the light.
 
J-A-M - Three standup targets. They are used to enable The Cream Rush.
 
Bumpers - Three of them, and they guarantee NOT to drain down the Outlane or middle. Any ball put into the bumpers will fall into a hole, and get kicked out to the left inlane, (_After_ the switch).
 
Gate - Shoot the ball into the bumpers through this one way gate, from the right flipper.
 
C-R-E-A-M - Five standup targets that are used to enable The Cream Rush.
 
Left Orbit - Same location as TZs upper left flipper. It is used to pump up the Trandem's tires (Pressure), and to shoot the Tower during Kitten multi-ball. The Left orbit goes around the back of the machine, and feeds the upper-right (full length) flipper. Similar to Getaway.
 
Spinner - Situated at the very back of the machine. Balls from the left and right orbits go past the spinner. Used to enable Light The Lamp.
 
BIG - A standup target wedged between the left orbit and the Left String.
 
STRING - Two lanes that cross each other twice. Each lane has a spinner, and the ball is fed to the end of the right orbit, and ultimately, to the bumpers. String is sort of a cross between the Boat on Fish Tales, and the Billion/Mini-playfield ramp from bride of Pinbot.
 
Start Job - Used to start a Job (mode). Next to STring, in the very centre of the machine is Start Job. It's like Mode Start on Indi, but has a hole at the end <balls are popped to the left inlane>. Used to start Jobs .. see below.
 
Light House - This shot is just right of Start Job. It normally feeds balls directly to the Lock/Pressure lane (more later), but during Light The Lamp, balls are diverted to the Light House.
(There is a miniature lighthouse on the playfield too.)
 
POINTS - A standup target wedged on the right of the entrance to the Light House lane.
 
Records - Just above RUN! (opposite the GOODIES targets) are three black standup targets (records).
Used to enable Radio Goodies.
 
Run! - Also the jackpot during Chase Multiball. This is shootable from the upper right flipper, and is similar to the WhirlPool shot on White Water, except it's not a ramp, just a sinkhole.
 
Lock/Pressure lane - Also shotable from the upper right flipper. This is similar to Insanity falls on White Water, except it's not a ramp, and normally feeds balls back to the left orbit (like the upper flipper shot on Getaway). When Lock is lit, balls are diverted to a popper. It is also used to build up Pressure.
 
G-O-O-D-I-E-S - Seven targets at the entrance to the Lock/Pressure lane.
They are in the same place as the lowest traffic lights on Getaway. Each completion of Goodies increaes the bonus multiplier (max at x10), and often the 'Goodies. Goodie Goodie yumm yumm' quote.
 
Radio Goodies - This is just a small boat. The actual radio shot is the right orbit.
 
Extra Ball target - Small target wedged on the edge of the right orbit.
Right Orbit - (Same place as TZs lock) The reverse path of the left orbit, except balls are feed to the bumpers to increase the size of the kitten. During Radio Goodies, the ball will be diverted to the Radio. It's in a similar place as Burn Rubber on Getaway.
 
Post Office Tower - The middle of the back of the machine fetures the Post Office Tower. This is used during Kitten Multiball.
 
Ramp - The ramp goes past the Tandem and back to the left Inlane. Used to Lock balls, build up Pressure, or go to the Concrete Block. Enough ramps will light extra ball. It's in a similar place as the right orbit on Getaway.
 
Concrete Block - On the right side of the ramp entrance is a miniature 350 foot high block of concrete. During the Concrete mode, a trapdoor at the base of the ramp opens for the Concrete Shots. (If lock is lit, the ball will be locked instead. Pressure cannot be collected from the ramp during this round <unless lock is lit!>)
 
S-C-O-N-E-S - Six stand-up targets on the right side of the playfield. Used to enable The Cream Rush.
 
Computer - Sitting right next to the plunger lane, and behind the SCONES targets, is a mini version of Graeme's computer. The front (horizontal) panel has three analogue meters (like VU meters (on stereo's etc..)).
The first one is marked Pressure, and it shows how pumped up the tires are on the tandem. The middle one has a sun on one side, and a moon on the other; it shows how dark it is (more later). The last meter has 0 (zero) on one side, 175 in the middle, and 350 on the right; it shows how tall the concrete block is. The back-board (vertical panel) has a few blinking lights, and two 7 segment LEDs that show random numbers every now and then.
 
Plunger Lanes - Yes, it IS plural. Same set up as TZ. The automatic plunger shoots the ball straight into a hole, the ball is then popped to the right in-lane. The manual plunger shoots the ball into the Lock/Pressure lane (same as on The Getaway).
 
G-I-B-B-O-N - Six targets scattered around. Hit them all to enable Funky Gibbon.
 
Tandem - Sitting on the left of the playfield (over the bumpers) is the Tandem. It is used to hold locked balls for Chase multiball. It is fed via a habitrail, and three diverters determan whether the ball is locked on the first, second or last seat of the bike. The ball can also go straight past the tandem if lock wasn't lit, or during a multiplayer game when the necessary seat is taken. When the balls are unlocked, they return to the habitrail, which takes them, to the left inlane. For more information, see the section on MultiBall.
 
Part 2: Rules & Multiball – This will appear in C&G #151 (June 2008)
 
The full article will be put on the website under "Goodies Articles – Creative" in the near future.
 
 
7. GOODIES CROSSWORD
********************
(by Brett Allender)
 
Here's a new Goodies crossword for fans of the superchaps three to puzzle over.
 
As with my previous crosswords, if you're not familiar with a number of the Goodies episodes listed, the information in my Goodies Episode Summaries (in the "Articles/Guides" section) should help you solve the clues.
 
There is also a copy of the grid and clues in a print-friendly Word format in the "Articles/Guides" section of the website at http://www.goodiesruleok.com/articles.php?id=88&page=4  along with the solution on a separate page. The solution will also be printed in next month's newsletter.
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* CLUES *
 
ACROSS
 
Row 1, column 1 (6 letters) - This bedtime drink is originally called Venom (??????)
 
Row 2, column 9 (3 letters) - Bill's girlfriend Barbara is an inspector for Women's ??? (Free To Live)
 
Row 3, column 1 (7 letters)  - If Tim is made an OBE and an Earl, he'll become one of these (Royal Command)
 
Row 3, column 11 (2 letters) - Big Bunny talk – "Nyaah, what's ?? Doc?!" (Invasion Of The Moon Creatures)
 
Row 5, column 1 (4 letters) - He is shown as a blindfolded judge at the Trendsetters Ball – surname (Punky Business)
 
Row 5, column 7 (6 letters) - The Music Master's dopey offsider (The Music Lovers)
 
Row 7, column 3 (4 letters) - Bill (to Tim): "Only us ???? people can go to the ball. You're too pretty!" (Punky Business)
 
Row 7, column 8 (4 letters) - This animal dances with the tourists at the castle (Camelot)
 
Row 9, column 1 (6, 4 letters) - Twinkle ultimately turns into this fearsome creature (?????? ????)
 
Row 10, column 10 (3 letters) -  Bill (starting his story): "Long time ??? ... " (Kung Fu Kapers)
 
Row 11, column 3 (8 letters) - Bill shocks Desiree Carthorse by saying this to her (Gender Education)
 
Row 12, column 1 (3 letters) - Cured patient after tasting Graeme's elixir: "??? whiz!" (Hospital For Hire)
 
Row 12, column 10 (3 letters) - The funky dancing group, ???'s Grannies (Goodies Almost Live)
 
 
 
DOWN
 
Column 1, row 1 (12 letters) - Bill and Graeme both do this undesirable activity (Snooze)
 
Column 3, row 1 (3 letters) - Used with a kayak to get each of the Goodies out to the Saucy Gibbon (Radio Goodies)
 
Column 3, row 9 (2 letters) - Song lyric from "Funky Gibbon": "B, with just a little gibbon ????" (Goodies Almost Live)
 
Column 4, row 5 (5 letters)  - Mary Whitehouse plays rugby for the Festival Of ????? team (Wacky Wales)
 
Column 5, row 1 (3 letters) - The Lone Scout shows off his knot-tying skills at this place (Scoutrageous)
 
Column 5, row 9 (4 letters) - Tim is trying to make this kind of film (The Movies)
 
Column 7, row 3 (4 letters) - The name of Graeme's robot (U-Friend Or UFO)
 
Column 8, row 9 (4 letters) - Goodies backing song: "They're Taking ????" (Way Outward Bound)
 
Column 9, row 1 (5 letters) - Graeme cooks up Human ????? Soup for the Bu-Boom tribe (The Lost Tribe)
 
Column 10, row 9 (4 letters) - Bill does this repeatedly upon hearing that Tim has been jailed (Saturday Night Grease)
 
Column 11, row 2 (6 letters) - Graeme has this role at Charlie's mansion (Free To Live)
 
Column 12, row 8 (5 letters) - Bill's healthy meal features food mostly of this colour (Food)
 
 
8. QUIZ & QUOTE ANSWERS
***********************
 
(a) Tim
(b) Graeme's moon rocket which is outside the front door
(c) Invasion Of The Moon Creatures
(d) The Radio Times
(e) Venom
(f) "There's a good boy"
(g) Bill
(h) The Snooze sends him to sleep before he can try the antidote to it
 
 
YOUR SCORE:
8    Mastermind Of The Year
7    Goodies fan supreme
5-6 Clever clogs
3-4 Reasonably Goodie
1-2 Thick as old boots
0    Rolf Harris!
 
 
NEXT C&G EDITION:
- #151:    12th June 2008.
 
C&G BACK ISSUES CONTENTS INDEX: http://www.goodiesruleok.com/articles.php?id=45
 
*******************************************************************************
The Goodies Fan Club Clarion and Globe is copyright The Goodies Rule - OK! 2008. All rights reserved.
Permission to reproduce this work or any section of it, in any form must first be obtained from the copyright holders.
 
For further information regarding this publication please e-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com>.
For other general enquiries about the 'Goodies Rule - OK' fan club or 'The Goodies' itself, please e-mail enquiries@goodiesruleok.com
 
TO OBTAIN THIS NEWSLETTER IN WORD DOCUMENT FORM:
E-mail <clarion@goodiesruleok.com> requesting transfer to the Word mailing list.
******************************************************************************
 



Comments
good stuff, well done

you have my regards
Posted by:good6067

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